Lewd Dungeon, Book 28 Prologue (Patreon)

Prologue – Trade Chat

(Adventurer’s Guild Official Forums, Miami Branch)

SunnyBunz, MightyMouse, ImAPally, DontYouWantMe, AsaAkiraIsBae, BestGirl, LatinHeat, Salty, Backpage, Craig34, l33tpally, Anonymous3, Anonymous4, RedFox, Kimiko, DonnyJuan, Crusader, BadCompany, HurricaneGal, Ambassador, Scholar, Righteous, Id10t, Satyr, DarkEnchanter, RangerMiguel, ScoopGirl, VenusFlyTramp, MagicMike, TsundereHealer, Max, LightningLegacy, SwiftTaylor, Domino, Bacchus, Aegis, Temptation, and Lord_Kickass are in the chat.

Righteous: Guys, big news!

VenusFlyTramp: What is it?

Righteous: We just got to the Arena level in the dungeon, and the Demon isn’t the final boss anymore! You know what that means, right?

Satyr: Ooh, a new set of floors have opened up? Have you gone down yet?

Righteous: Just far enough to see the opening to the new floor. It is a desert floor. Like, sand and everything. And it was damn hot, too. That’s why we turned back. Plate armor is not fun in that kind of heat.

Salty: Ugh. Sounds like wearing an oven. Guess people will have to find a third armor set, to go with their normal armor, and the underwater gear.

Id10t: Well, the crafters will be thrilled, I’m sure. But I wonder what kind of monsters you can have in the desert? Most floors have some kind of plant or slime monsters on them, but the desert doesn’t really seem like the place for them, unless there are cactus monsters?

SwiftTaylor: Ugh. Final Fantasy flashbacks. Freaking needle attacks.

Aegis: Could always be worse. Knowing Temptation, I wouldn’t be surprised if there were ‘breeder’ cactus monsters there.

Temptation: There aren’t, but that’s an interesting idea I’ll keep for the future.

Aegis: damnit

Domino: Aegis, what did we say about giving the damn dungeon god ideas?

Aegis: yeah, yeah. My bad.

Crusader: Temptation, what did you do?

Temptation: I do a lot of things. You’re going to have to be more specific.

Crusader: What did you do to Pofmis?

Scholar: Wait, are you saying that Temptation somehow took out a god?

LatinHeat: How much XP does killing a god get you?

Temptation: Didn’t kill her. And fights between gods are rewarded differently than mortals fighting monsters. However, I did pick up some levels from the duel.

Scholar: Duel? You mean you actually fought Pofmis face to face?

Ambassador: You said you were going to calm things down, Temptation, not CHANGE THINGS ACROSS THE WHOLE GALAXY!

Crusader: Then, it wasn’t just me, then. It was all of her followers?

Backpage: What happened?

Crusader: All of a sudden, my symbol of Pofmis grew hot. Hot enough that it burned my skin. And I felt a compulsion from Her, through the connection I had through faith. It was—It was trying to make me enslave myself to the strongest person around.

Temptation: So, who ended up owning you?

Crusader: No one. My friends held me down, kept me from doing anything, until eventually the compulsion passed.

Temptation: Really? Well, that deserves my heartfelt congratulations. You are probably the only Pofmisian in the galaxy who isn’t a slave, now.

Crusader: As if you give a damn.

Temptation: Oh, about you, personally? No, not in the slightest. However, things that are unique? Those that overcome all odds? Well, even I have to respect that kind of tenacity.

Ambassador: How? How did you do this?

Temptation: The System has rules for when gods fight in the flesh. I managed to win our duel, thanks to some tricks I had on hand. Anyways, part of the System rules for a duel between gods includes a wager. And we both wagered that the winner could do whatever they wished to the loser, even erase them from existence entirely.

Scholar: You obviously didn’t kill her, so what did you do?

Temptation: I cut off her arms and legs at the torso, and forced her to change from Pofmis Chainbreaker to Pofmis the Willing, Goddess of Submission, and forced her to use her divine power to give every one of her followers a compulsion to become a slave.

Ambassador: Do you understand how much work this is going to cause? It was bad enough with Bluemountain becoming unstable. But now? The ruling faction in the Galactic Council is falling apart!

Temptation: Then perhaps they should have diversified their coalition.

Ambassador: AARGH! Do you know how much paperwork I’m going to have to do because of this?

Temptation: Don’t worry. Most of it isn’t your problem. It isn’t like you had any Pofmisians on staff, or they would have been thrown out months ago, after the edict against foreign-born Pofmisians coming to Sol.

BadCompany: Hey, how does this change affect the punishments you slapped on the followers of Pofmis?

Temptation: They’re released from things like Dungeon Foe or Anathema, unless they had them separately. The contract to keep out any foreign Pofmisians is ended now, too. But individual contracts will still need to run their course.

DarkEnchanter: As interesting as this is, I want to get back to what Righteous was talking about. This new set of floors being a desert is going to really screw with certain class types. I did a survival class on the desert, before the Apocalypse, and the kind of gear that many of the frontline fighters have is going to be bad news in the desert. And unless there’s water sources, you’re going to need to haul water around.

Salty: Some of that can be balanced with adding water to supplies in a pocket dimension, though.

DarkEnchanter: So long as one of the floors isn’t an anti-magic floor like the Water Temple.

Temptation: Oh, I’m not that evil. Remember, I try to at least keep the floors fair. If I added in anti-magic, then I’d have to lower the quality of the bosses too much to compensate, and wouldn’t have nearly as much fun.

ScoopGirl: Righteous, what did the new boss of the Arena look like? Was it someone we know?

Righteous: Actually, yeah. It was that banshee that the Demon made from the soul of the Crusader Champion who attacked him and failed horribly. She’s tough, being both undead and ‘selectively corporeal’, which makes fighting her a bitch. However, undead tactics work against her just fine, once you account for the level gap.

ScoopGirl: Huh. Has anyone talked with her, and seen how she, or the other Pofmisians in the Dungeon, are handling things?

Righteous: No, but I’m not sure whatever changes happened were in effect when we got to them, or not.

Temptation: Before you ask, ScoopGirl, yes, you can come and do an interview.

ScoopGirl: YES!