Ranger Who Laughs (Patreon)

Laughter is the best medicine unless it’s given by a twisted character. This is an idea that had been floating around ever since DC Comic’s Dark Multiverse arc came out. The Justice League and the Power Rangers had a history of team-up in the past, so there’s basically nothing to stop the Jokerized Batman of Earth -22 to visit Zordon and the Rangers!

Seeing what he did to his dimension’s Justice League, one could only use their imagination on what would the Batman Who Laughs do to these young and optimistic Power Rangers.

Special thanks to my lovely and loyal patrons:

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Time to laugh!

The eyes of the girl who sat before Jason lit up.

Jason caught the moment to repeat his answer. “Micropachycephalosaurus, right?”

The girl nodded excitedly. The teacher who observed the bonding process smiled gently in the back. Jason had worked hard to approach Eliza throughout the summer program. He learned sign languages and tirelessly encouraged them to be the best of themselves. But his personal success for the toned-bodied youngster was enabling the little girl to open up. Mrs. Effendi chuckled to herself and looked out the window.

Her expression changed. The windows erupted in a violent explosion that send shards of glass and people alike all across the kindergarten. Even the screams were immediately devoured by the deafening boom.

Jason found himself in an empty void. He was floating in nothingness. He looked down at his hands that moved slowly as if inside water. “I can’t be dead, right?” groaned the young hero in his usual red sleeveless shirt and baggy pants.

“Jason Lee Scott…” whispered the ominous voice that made Jason turn around. He gasped at the sight of a massive coated figure. The face was obscured with only menacing golden eyes were visible. Those were enough to send dread down Jason’s spine.

“What… What are you….”

The figure didn’t reply. He simply reached Jason with the gigantic yet skeletal arm. The youngster felt like the air in his lungs was simply squeezed out. That was nothing compared to what came next.

Jason screamed as the demon retracted his hand and opened his brimstone-filled mouth. He could hear the screams inside. He could feel the heat. Both of them were encroaching on his soul.

Jason woke up gasping. The first sensation that attacked him was pain. The bruises on his chest stung him, so was the headache from trauma. He coughed hard as he removed himself from the piling rubble.

Jason’s breath ran out when he saw his surroundings. The kindergarten had been torn apart. The walls were broken, the windows shattered, and the ceiling collapsed. The structural damage trampled on the classroom items as well as the classmates. One little feminine arm stuck out between the slabs.

Jason barely had the strength to call out her name. He wasn’t sure that he wanted to know the truth. “Eliza…?”

“Eliza has gone sleeping for a long time, Buddy. Would you like to send a message instead?” asked the formless voice mockingly between the burning ruins before giving out a burst of maniacal laughter.

“Who’s there?! Show yourself!”

“Don’t you remember me, Jason? Both of us go way back! Or perhaps that young brain of yours is having difficulty in storing big information?”

“Don’t you play games with me? Are you the one who’s responsible for this carnage?! I’m going to end you!”

Jason’s threat was met with more chortle. As if his emotion was feeding it with more power. The flames around the young hero burned brighter and illuminated a dark figure that shouldn’t be there.

Jason sensed it, but the shadow would disappear the moment he tried to look at it. Slowly but surely, more shapes appeared and seemingly encircled the unmorphed Red Ranger between the broken structures. The hero saw no other choice but to morph.

“It’s Morphin’ Time!” shouted Jason as he brandished the Power Buckle. The Tyrannosaurus Power Coin glimmered and burst with pure gallant energy of the Morphing Grid. It immediately merged with his body and formed the signature tight spandex bodysuit. The last part to be assembled was his rigid helmet with a single visor glass mimicking the prehistoric reptile’s mouth.

Not playing around, Jason also summoned his Power Sword. Fires around him were swept by the sheer force of his transformation. “Tyrannosaurus!”

Instead of feeling intimidated, the disembodied voice merely giggled. “Are you ready to go surfing, Mate?” asked him condescendingly. “You look so mindblowing!”

The last word felt wrong. The Red Ranger moved in superhuman speed, just in time to block the incoming attack. Clanging noise echoed in the destroyed kindergarten as his Power Sword blade went against a crowbar.

“Crow! Crow!” shouted the midget-sized clown that held the melee weapon as he tried to smack Jason over and over again. Thankfully, the Tyrannoranger got more to offer.

Or so he thought. He didn’t think that there would be more than one of that creepy-looking pale ghoul. He looked to the left just before his helmet was struck right on the visor. The costume would protect him, but it still hurt.

But the ordeal had just begun. A third attack came from behind. Jason was hit on the back, on the side of his waist, and behind his knee. A kick forced him to kneel and the battle became disarrayed for the young hero. Between the pain of crowbars hitting his suit and the mocking laughter, Jason felt fear.

Finally, another kind of pain struck the Red Ranger. Jason actually screamed in agony as one of the ghouls bit his bicep. He desperately tried to remove the midget enemy to no avail. Another one bit him close to his wrist and made him drop the Power Sword. The third ghoul simply pissed on his visor laughing like a psycho. That of course before hitting his helmet with the crowbar again and again.

The attack ended as fast as it occurred. The fallen Red Ranger was left behind by the three ghouls that robbed him of his Power Sword and Blaster. One of them tried to get his Power Coin but cried out when he was electrocuted. The midget ran into the darker part of the destroyed building to meet his owner.

“I expect the lamest hero I can find, but this is ridiculous, Jason. Has peace weakened you or are you simply a moron?” ridiculed the glowing smile in the dark.

“Who.. Who are you?” Jason struggled to move. But he needed to move. He didn’t know who or what his enemy was then, but he knew not to show weakness in front of him. “I’m just getting started…”

“The brain of a kid is smaller than an adult. A hard fact especially when I’m done cutting that silly heroism from yours!” The silhouette showed more of itself before the Red Ranger.

Inside his helmet, Jason’s tired eyes widened. He shook his head in disbelieve. “No… That can’t be….”

“You should have recognized my babies, my Rabid Robins,” said the Batman Who Laughs as he pulled the leash on his pale children. “Bruce Wayne, at your service.”

“No.. But you… You’re a hero!” blurted Jason still in denial.

“Oh, now you remember! You of course remember our glorious team-up, right? Justice League and the Power Rangers coming together to fight the dua threat of Brainiac and Zedd. Massive battle! Brilliant fights! Justice always prevails!” The evil Batman cracked up. “I guess the critics saw that the story was too cliche. The multiverse needs a fresh set of stories. This one has your name is written all over it, Jason!”

“What happened to you? There must be something of the Batman I knew in there! You have to fight it!”

The maniacal har-har filled the air. “I’m afraid that the little Bruce that you knew has gone now. He was swallowed by comedy and laughter after he inhaled the Joker’s soul. In my world, I played with the mangled corpses of the whole Justice League during my spare time.” I comically whispered more of the details. “I actually have too much spare time so I extended the collection to the Justice League International and the Lantern Corps. Hahaha!”

“Crow!” called out one of the Rabid Robins as he plucked the arm of poor Eliza from the rubble.

“You sick bastard. Leave her alone!”

But the Red Ranger wasn’t in the position to fight anymore. He could feel his body being twisted by an unseen force. His muscles ached. It was getting worse the closer Batman Who Laughs get. “What are you doing to me?”

His answer first came in the form of a barrage of crowbar attacks. Even the mighty Power Ranger suit had its limits. On the last strike, half of the visor glass shattered. Jason’s eyes were visible to his surprise enemy. He felt like his eyes were burning. “What… What is this?!”

“Toxin, Little Red Ranger. Joker Toxin. But that’s just the trailer of what I have in store for you.” Batman Who laughs put out his Batarang. He hit the sharp end of the throwing weapon to stab Jason’s Power Coin. The Tyrannoranger vomited all over the interior of his helmet, some of the lunch even spurting out of the broken visor.

“No, this is wrong… I feel wrong…!” shrieked Jason as he held his helmet in excruciating pain.

“You got that right, Red Ranger!” squealed the evil Batman as he twisted the Batarang counterclockwise.

Jason felt as if his organs were contorted in the same direction. He arched as his entire body stood on the tip of his Ranger toes. His gut-wrenching screams were endless and were met by the insulting barking of the Rabid Robins.

“I have laced my Batarang with a special kind of Joker Toxin, similar to the one that twisted me way before. With it, I can pierce into your feeble Morphing Grid and take what I want. Basically, everything!” Batman Who Laughs let out a psychotic excitement before continuing with the punchline. “How does it feel to be my Ranger Who Laughs, Jason?!”

With his other hand, Batman Who Laughs easily ripped Jason’s helmet and tossed it away. He grabbed the back of the young hero’s head and forced him to come closer. Too close as he then kissed Jason ravenously.

While his mouth was being explored by Batman’s serpentine tongue, the Red Ranger could feel the invading corruption. He was forced to swallow Batman’s puke made of concentrated toxin. His digestive system was being flooded by the hellish substance. His blood was made to absorb all of the evil inside.

Throughout the kiss, Jason barely held his consciousness. His eyes poured flowing tears and the pupils ran up with ecstasy. The Red Ranger tried to resist, but his voice became inaudible jabbering. “No… No….!”

Batman Who Laughs finally released him. Jason vomited some of the disgusting slimes that he was forced to take in. There was a loud thump as the evil Batman kicked him on the chest.

Jason was coughing helplessly on the ground. Moreover, his body began to feel the corruption’s effects. The tear that flowed out of his eyes were now black. Veins of similar color sprouted out of his neck and were felt growing all over his body. His muscles stiffened and tangled to painful positions.

But Batman Who Laughs still wanted to play. In his hand was no longer his corrupting Batarang, but a Power Buckle. The cursed item was similar to Jason’s but crimson-and-black in color. Dancing along the way, the villain approached the defeated spandex hero. “There are some things in this world that are better left unchanged. Your depressing power isn’t one of them!”

Devoid of Morphing Grid connection, Red Ranger’s Power Buckle came out easily. Batman Who Laughs slapped his twisted version into Jason’s belt to replace it. The young hero’s mind was fried from thereon.

His Tyrannoranger power burned bright before dimmed into a deluge of sinister flames. Jason cried in pain as the infernal transformation took over. The spandex fabric of his heroic costume was being perverted in the worst way. His boots, his gauntlets, his gloves, all were crooked and deformed into a form more suiting as Batman Who Laughs’ newest creation.

What remained of Jason’s helmet flew out before hitting him back on the chest. It was the ultimate testament of debasement. The broken hero will have something else to cover his head with.

Leather-like straps wrapped around his arms and legs akin to bondage attire. The last part of Jason’s descent into madness was the sharp stings he felt from neck to toe. Something was being drained from his body.

Jason’s face became paler and paler as more of his blood was sucked by his own costume. The very thing that should have been protected his identity as a superhero was now feeding on his bodily fluid. The other sensation that he felt between his legs indicated that the suit was even hungrier.

Jason Lee Scott had lost his ability to speak. His mouth wasn’t mute, but his brain had suffered so much of Batman Who Laughs’ toxin that he couldn’t form any complete sentences. He was made debilitated. His mouth, now showing nice clown-like red lips that matched his pale face, was drooling. But then, Jason laughed.

He laughed and laughed and laughed. Even as his voice was gone, he continue to laugh. Only gagging noises and the Rabid Robins's continuous mocking were heard in the burned-down kindergarten.

“So many things you can achieve in this world, Kid. You’d bring Barbatos’ will and drag this pitiful world to the Dark Multiverse.” As the corrupted Jason bend down to Batman Who Laughs’ crotch, the villain whispered. “Bring us more Rangers….”

The Ranger Command Center was lively with the returning Power Rangers. Billy, Zack, Kimberly, and Trini had just teleported into the Power Chamber. Zack even gave the seemingly-normal Jason a big bearhug. “This might sound weird, but I miss you guys!” declared the black youngster as he released his team leader.

“Aw, me too, Zack!” replied Trini while uncovering her left ear from her silky hair. “This must be the longest time for us to not have any of Rita’s pesky monster attack.”

Kimberly snorted while she took out the doodling book from her bag. “For all we know, she’s probably sunbathing in a bikini somewhere-”

Zack slapped the back of his nerd friend. “Naw, Zordon would’ve told us. Say, Billy, what have you been up to?”

“Wait, wait, wait,” interrupted Kimberly, making everyone stop their commotion. She glanced to Jason who had his back against them all this time. “Jason, why are you shying away from us?” When she didn’t get the answer, Kimberly continued her teasing. “Mr. Jason Lee Scott, what in the name of color-coordinated supersoldierdom did you up to that makes you look so bashful?”

Jason was hesitant. He rubbed his hair. He still didn’t dare to look back at his friends. “Well, this is… Embarrassing. But, uh… I think it would be good to share with you guys.”

“Please,” begged Trini in the cutest way.

“I, uh…” Jason glanced back at this team. “I learned what my favorite dinosaur is.”

That made all of the other Rangers confused. Shrugging, Kimberly brought out her Power Buckle. “Is this it?”

Giggling, Trini nodded to Kimberly and did the same with her Sabertooth Tiger Power Buckle. “Well, mine’s not officially a dino, but it’s close enough.”

“Same with me,” added Zack with his Mastodon power.

“Mine is the most suitable then,” said Billy as he displayed his Triceratops one.

Jason turned around with a smile on his face. A wicked smile instead of the one usually given by the kindhearted jock. Out of his jacket, he threw Batarangs to stab his teammates’ Power Buckle.

Kimberly and the others were electrocuted. Demonic energy surged throughout their body and paralyzed them on the spot. “Jason… What… What are you doing?”

The corrupted Jason towered over his helpless friends. He kicked Zack’s face before stepping on his chest. “My favorite dinosaur is the dead dinosaur. Hahaha!”

His laughter was not normal. He sounded and acted like a lunatic. But then something worse happened. Jason wiped his face and the fake skin color peeled off. His true Jokerized form was for everyone to see. “Hiya, Zordon!”

“Jason, you must stop. This evil in you is bringing too much suffering!” boomed Zordon’s voice.

“So, I can continue if there’s only a LITTLE suffering?” He looked at his own gesture of a small thing. He then looked down at his crotch. “I guess your big blue head is compensating for something you don’t have! Hahaha!”

“I’m sorry, Jason. But I-” Zordon’s voice cracked. The space wizard was visibly distressed. He opened his mouth to speak, but no words came out. The hyperdimensional mist around his floating head inside the gigantic glass cylinder began to stir. Then, a shadow loomed before the Rangers’ mentor. It was a shadow of a bat.

Then Batman Who Laughs’ own face consumed Zordon’s form from behind. The villain’s mouth opened unnaturally wide to swallow the space wizard as his victim screamed in ethereal pain. Zordon was devoured by a whirlpool of evil until now was left except the corrupted Justice League hero’s maniacal laughter. “So this is how it feels to be a god. I gotta say, that deadbeat Zordon didn’t know what he was doing. You can do so much more if you already have the courage to recruit children as your personal army! Jason, show the world how it’s done!”

“Alright, Batsy! It’s Mental Time!” The evil Jason brought out his Power Buckle. The power of Morphing Grid's energy enveloped him and transformed him into the menacing malicious Red Ranger to the disbelief of his teammates. But they would get their own moments.

Kimberly shrieked in agony as her Power Buckle began to be forcefully merged with the corrupting Batarang that stabbed it. The rusty color spread out and consumed the pure Pterodactyl spirit and twisted it into its bidding.

Kimberly’s civilian clothes, just like everyone else’s, erupted into nakedness. The deformed Power Buckles then jabbed their lower abs and ensnared their waists with leather belts. Out of the perverted transformation trinkets, more of their new form outstretched to suffocate the Rangers. Zack and Billy felt like they were being encased in wretchedly-tight latex costumes fit for bondage sessions. Leather straps, metallic rings, and spikes adorned their new costumes of depravity. The two boys wailed as black jockstraps pulled their batons up in a weird wedgie. Bikinis formed to cup the girls’ increasingly provocative new shape. “Jason, please…” begged Trini as she could feel her mind being drained. She giggled at the first thought of torturing her classmates. Absent-mindedly, the Yellow Ranger stabbed the air around her with her dangerous Power Daggers.

“It’s so much fun!” declared Jason like a rabid dog inside his twisted new helmet. His visors were gone, replaced by gigantic fangs of the Tyrannosaurus mouth that the head protector is mimicking. His former helmet with crossed-out eyes now decorated his chest where the purple Joker Dragon Shield reached out. His teammates would soon achieve the same hellish transformation. Their former identity was now nothing more than the remainder of the consumed souls.

But their fate was worse than Jason’s if such a thing was possible. In the background, the ethereal Batman Who Laughs unleashed his booming har-har. The very structure of the Ranger Command Center building was slowly being corrupted into his image. Black tentacles launched out at the Pink, Yellow, Black, and Blue Rangers before pulling them to the wall. As if their induced insanity wasn’t enough, they were forced to merge with the surrounding structure. “They can be useful for later,” said the floating jester head of Batman inside the glass cylinder. “For now, the joke’s on you, Ranger Who Laughs!”

The prank had just begun.