Illithid Behind the Curtain; Yo ho, yo ho (Patreon)

"Esme?"

"Yes?" I ask, as we're led into the cavern by our escort party. The Drow are cautious, but after a messenger was sent, apparently, we were intriguing enough to actually be brought in. With my knowledge of the Drow, I could see various traps and a few ballistae set up, but my attention is fixed on iron spikes set about and radiating a bubble of something I'm hard pressed to put my finger on.

It feels almost like Pass Without Trace, but different. It's also a little crude and the subsequent bubble would be obvious to any spellcaster, but here in Remnant it's actually perfect. Though not entirely, I can see marks of battle here and there where a wandering Grimm might had been exploring, before the crew took them down. A bit further on, two Umber Hulks by a passageway hiss and chitter, the Drow doing something to get us to pass as they return back to their post. But Taiyang's attention is on something else entirely, fixed at what lies before us as he asks.

"Is it just me, or am I seeing a submarine in the cavern?"

I look at it, our escorts gesturing us to keep walking as I speak. "If it's an illusion, then I'm seeing it too." And together, we enter the court of Captain Jarlaxle Baenre. I was hard pressed to think of any other name for it, the massive cavern almost dominated by the submarine as a campsite is set up before it.

The submarine itself looks like a manta ray, looming from the shadows and illuminated in the firelight like some pagan god of the sea. In elvish script, I can read the name Scarlet Marpenoth clearly on the side, as rock gnomes clad in uniforms work their way over it alongside a few ape-like creatures I recognized as Hadozee. It's been damaged, scorch marks present as if something had tried to melt the thing, as great rents on one side indicate something with claws tried to rake at it. Putting this mystery to the side, I look back to the crew.

The majority of crew members are Drow, but there's a few more diverse types in the crowd now as we're brought before a table. Two massive, hippo headed figures who seem to be bodyguards as feet propped on his table, a glacier snake coiled around an arm is captain Jarlaxle Baenre himself.

A male drow, dressed like a classic pirate with the wide brimmed hat, eye patch and coat, a grin on his face more suited for a car salesman than the underworld power he was. His fingers were moving to the beat of music being played by a small band of goblins, some kind of upbeat, wild tune that only added to the surreal image of it all as he suddenly 'saw' us, let out a theatrical gasp and putting his pet to the side, sprung to his feet as he cried out.

"I had heard someone had been calling my hospitality into order! This cannot stand! Captain Jarlaxle Baenre is defunct in nothing! Wine for our guests! And keep playing!" He clapped his hands, a few heading off to follow his orders as seats were brought and the captain vaulted over, to shake mine and Taiyang's hands rapidly. His grin was broad, a glint of gold seen in his smile as he spoke warmly.

"A pleasure indeed! A pleasure indeed! Ah, but I fear my little Evie's eyes are betraying her, and at her age as well!" He leaned in slightly, looking me in the eye as he spoke softly, so only Taiyang and I heard.

"Because you're missing some key features my friend."

My ears. I was suddenly hit by the knowledge that I had forgotten to make them pointy, so distracted I was this morning. And like that, Captain Jarlaxle had been tipped off and would be on his guard. He was genial for a Drow and if I was being honest, he kind of sounded like Hondo Ohnaka to my ears and the way he acted.

But you don't become captain of a race notorious for backstabbing and skullduggery, much less the leader of the Bregan D'aerthe for collecting bottle caps and after that little wink, he held out a chair for me and Taiyang before gracefully leaping back to his seat, utterly relaxed and at ease... And completely devoid in my senses. I couldn't sense anything from him, but he wasn't an illusion so how...?

He winked again, holding up his hand and the ring on it. Made of obsidian, and obviously built to his specifications but the effect itself...

"Just a little something in case we meet something more intrusive in our travels. The multiverse is a dangerous place, full of rapscallions and ner-do-wells! Isn't that right, Greg?"

"My name is Ed." Grunted the Giff next to him, the other adding.

"I'm Greg." Jarlaxle pouted. "In my defense, I'm still learning. You both still look alike to me..." He then smiled and turned to us, before asking. "And who exactly, am I speaking to then? I won't ask what, we all have our secrets after all! But I will admit to some curiosity as to what you, considering a bladesinger... And a non-elf to boot, are doing out here in the arse-end of nowhere!" He turned and grinned widely.

"Of course, going native is nothing new to our kind either, yes?"

"They're my friend." Taiyang said casually, unbothered by the number of wandering potential enemies as he added with a grin. "Besides, from what she tells me, you're a long way from home yourself. I'm Taiyang by the way."

"Esmerelda." I say back, already uncomfortable. Jarlaxle laughed again.

"Too true, too true! Ah, but what an adventure it has been! Admittedly, it has been mostly accidental, but the best adventures are based on happy accidents, are they not?"

"Like visiting the Rock of Bral?" I say knowingly and Jarlaxle's grin grows slyer as he gave me a round of applause as a server brings us the wine.

"Oh bravo! Indeed yes! I see I am dealing with a seasoned traveler and not simply some portal-stumbling adventurer! Yes, it was the fruit of a great heist planned for years! A little bit of borrowing from some place on Nimbral." I almost choked on my wine, hearing that as Jarlaxle grinned even prouder. Taiyang looked concerned as I stared at the Drow with the biggest, pair of balls this side of Remnant.

"You robbed the Spelljammer Academy?!"

"'Rob' is such a harsh word! I'll return the helm eventually. Someday. A few hundred years down the line perhaps, who knows? Nevertheless, between the spelljamming helm and some other trinkets, my crew was able to modify my beloved vessel and we soon left our world! Paid a visit to Bral and then as we were heading back, we ran into a problem."

I grimaced and looked to the scorch marks again as I speak.

"Of the red dragon variety, I take it?"

Taiyang looks alarmed and Jarlaxle nods, his genial manner replaced with something a little sharper as he adds. "Githyanki. So annoying, so persistent. We were forced to evade them via an asteroid field, followed by an uncharted warp. We ended up in a strange, electrified field of star dust with a sensory jammer quality. And blind, damaged what choice did we have but to keep going?"

"What indeed." I'm a little relieved to be honest, from the sounds of it, it feels like an accident they came here. Which means my little jump on Christmas had no consequences... That I knew of. On the other hand, a barrier around the Sphere of Remnant was very much new to me. It certainly sounded like one, designed to keep out all but the most determined. "What happened then?"

Jarlaxle shrugged. "We found this planet. Made our way down, then took inventory. All very boring, clerical stuff. But we find something else too!" He beamed and reached into his pouch, pulling out the largest dust crystal I've seen. Uncut, gleaming blue as Taiyang's eyes grow wide at the words of Jarlaxle, blithe and unaware.

"These were imbedded in our hull, but when we entered atmosphere, they suddenly became infused with new life! Our artificers LOVE it, and are calling it Spark Rocks!"

"Around here, we call it dust." Taiyang said and Jarlaxle looked suddenly, very interested.

"Oh? Do tell."~

"Were there a lot of them in that barrier?" I ask and Jarlaxle muses to himself and nods. "Some big, some small, some as big as my beloved vessel itself! And so many colors! Ah, if we weren't running for our lives, I feel we could have appreciated it more! Especially if they are as valuable as your friend indicates!"

Taiyang and I exchange looks and I turn to Jarlaxle as I ask. "What are your intentions?" The captain shrugs and grins. "My intentions? The same as ever of course! Captain Jarlaxle goes where the money is and there is much to be made here, if I am not mistaken! My nose is never wrong! Isn't that right, Greg?"

"I'm Ed."

Jarlaxle turned in his seat, one eyebrow raised before the Giff chuckles.

"Just fucking with you captain." Jarlaxle laughed uproariously, as he slapped his knee and turned back to us. "Of course, that will have to wait. Currently, we are stranded and my engineers say we won't be lifting off for a while. Especially as the helm broke in our controlled fall."

He set the dust crystal between us, one arm up against his eyes like some fainting damsel as the pirates within eyeshot chuckled, others rolling their eyes in exasperation.

"If only, we knew someone with the knowledge to repair it! Some beautiful, humanoid female who might have the arcane knowledge, who is powerful enough to avoid the fun of a spelljammer. Why, if there was someone I knew of who had this ability... I'd be incredibly grateful."

I slowly, begin to smile. I lean forward, Taiyang giving me a proud grin as I try to focus and speak.

"Captain, let's negotiate."

====

In the end, we settled on a very good deal. In exchange for a down payment of 10,000 gold dragons I would be a chief investor in the new, Bregan D'aerthe Dust Mining Company. In addition, besides fixing the Spelljammer Helm, Jarlaxle would be utilizing my Well of Many Worlds for his own people and a few Dwarf clans he knew of who 'were looking for work.'

All of which would be settling in Patch, creating a trading post under my eye and turning my little piece of heaven into something more. I was a little nervous about it all things considered, because if this worked, I was going to turn Remnant on its head and expose the fact that I was in fact, a very powerful wizard. That would definitely garner eyes turned to me from both factions. But if it worked, the advantages would be too large to ignore. And it also furthered my own schemes and my attempts to fix the Weave on Remnant.

It needed to heal, it felt like a dog that had been tortured and left alone in the dark, whimpering and terrified. The more it was exercised and used, the more it felt like it was being patched up, like the dog was re-learning care and love as it responded in kind. And while I was powerful, trying to fix it by myself would be like trying to bail out a sinking ship with a bucket.

But quantity had a quality all on its own and it didn't hurt that Jarlaxle knew very well what he had to gain. The clink of coins was ringing in his ears, a new world to exploit, to learn and to explore in addition was all he needed to get on board. And where a new Sphere came, while troubles would soon follow and I was wise enough to see it, I also saw the wind for what it was.

Because if Adventurers didn't soon follow, eager to kill Grimm for coin and profit, I didn't know the adventurer mindset at all.

Taiyang sought me out, worried afterwards as he asked me in private. "Are you alright with all this? I appreciate what you're doing, and Patch is going to flourish like nothing else, but I know you've wanted privacy and retirement. This is going to expose you onto the world stage like a Beowolf at a Schnee party."

Left unsaid was the other bit, my constant avoidance of both powers on Remnant as I smiled wryly.

"There are no accidents. And true, that might had been my rule. But times are changing and with a support base, I'll be able to do a lot more for my favorite people. Besides, there's something else about rules that you have to learn about wizards."

"And what would that be?" Taiyang asked, curious now as I grinned with a smile more befitting for C'gorath than Esmerelda as I quote Sir Terry.

"When you break rules, you break them good and hard."