Illithid behind the Curtain: I want to Believe (Patreon)

Taiyang Xiao Long was utterly terrifying. Oh, not in the way he could fight, I've seen and experienced worst. But rather in the sheer, relentless manner he earnestly tried to be friends with me despite everything I did to reject it. And what was worse was the fact he meant every moment of it, coming to my door with his daughters to foster food of one kind or another. His psionic sense felt brittle, pain and depression coloring his otherwise happy nature and what part of me was still human was loath to do anything to really shatter that. For one, that would have an adverse long-term effect on the children for much later when they went out into the world for their own adventures. I certainly didn't want to fight Salem, nor did I want to fight Ozpin. I was no plucky hero; my adventures were over and done.

My only role at this point was to fade into the background as an NPC and sometime guide-slash-cameo appearance.

But he. Wouldn't. Let me!

And if I was being honest, I didn't really fight too hard back either, if only for two little reasons.

Joy exploded in a burst that was almost overwhelming, pure happiness incredibly alien to a Mind Flayer being soaked up by me, as Ruby begged. "Again! Again!"

"Me too, me too!" Yang begged and I held back a sigh. Once more, my hand reached out and Yang began to float upward, giggling as I applied my psionic abilities, turned to the amusement of children as outside on my lawn, chairs and a table had been set up if only to keep them outside of my tower. Taiyang looked impressed, looking on as he spoke. "That's a pretty incredible semblance, Mr. Rincewind."

What? They kept calling me 'Mr. Wizard.' When he asked my name, I might had panicked and said the first one that came to mind. Now I was stuck with it, unless I wanted to practice my mental abilities beyond surface thoughts on a cast member.

Memo to me, find someone that no one will miss and practice on them.

Aloud, I spoke and felt tongue tied, bereft of the purity of mental communication. Such an appalling and lesser way of speech, when you could simply transmit your meaning and shades of understanding through the power of your mind. "It's called 'The Sorcerer's Apprentice.' Normally I use it to assist in my work. Or do the chores." Yes, I was styling myself on Yen Sid in terms of a front and it made a good explanation for them if they kept seeing my Invisible Servants working around. Idly, I gently put Yang down and then began to levitate Ruby, the latter giggling as she flapped her arms in play.

Taiyang looked impressed as he surveyed the current look of the place and added. "Well, it's made you quite the home. Have you ever thought about-." I interrupted immediately, both knowing his words and wanting to cut it off at the root.

"-Advertising it? Using it for others? Absolutely not. I am where I am now, because people couldn't leave well enough alone. I like my privacy; I despise being pushed and I hate people. And now my only use for my powers is for myself." I felt a little tug on my leg and glanced down at Yang, who smiled, and I sighed, picking her up and putting her on my lap. Immediately, she went for my untouched snack and began munching quietly in contentment as I added. "I trust I made myself clear?"

The smug little shit was definitely related to Yang, that cocky smile and psionic signature only amused as he nodded and lied. "Oh yes, absolutely." He got to his feet, clapped his hands and spoke. "Ok kids, we have to go!" The disappointment radiating made me wince, and I wondered how low I had fallen to be reduced to the level of children's playground. But both got up or floated down obediently, gave me hugs and kept waving till I was out of sight, my hand idly up before I scowled and began cleaning up.

And stepping into my tower, took back my form as everything became muted once more. Unbidden, words I had read long ago made a comeback as I floated down towards the subterrain levels of my tower.

Illithids feel intense emotions but internalize them almost completely. A mind flayer that looks calm might be raging with a cauldron of emotion beneath the surface. In addition, an illithid's emotions are entirely negative: Anger, fear, envy, hate, shame, indignation, contempt, pride, and anxiety comprise nearly their entire emotional repertoire. The closest they come to experiencing joy is the feeling they get when eating a brain, but even this is mixed with such sadistic and hateful overtones that it can't be considered "happiness" as most races would define it.

This constant negative emotional state colors an illithid's every thought and perception. Because it knows no happiness, it spends no time planning how to become happy. Pride, satiated curiosity, and self-satisfaction are a mind flayer's highest emotional states. These feelings motivate it to action.

As a Mind Flayer, I could confirm this was all true. Only because I had once been human, could I have the moral and emotional sense I had now. Feeling it as an Illithid on the other hand was incredibly difficult, the mental and physical physiology working against me as I fought the base urges that pervaded me as a result of it. Food for example, I could eat just about anything. But I truly wanted, what I truly craved was brains. Sentient brains, brains full of life and experience, intelligent and craven. A single one would have been divine, and more importantly it wasn't something I could just magic away either.

Mind Flayers required brains for the simple fact that they derived nutrients and psionic energy from them that couldn't be obtained anywhere else. It was akin to a case I read long ago, about a man who died of starvation, eating rabbits. My internal system was a hodgepodge of physical and arcane components and interesting as it was, the constant need to feed only made me grumpier, more lean and more prone to snap.

I likely would have, had it not been for those girls. I felt human again in their presence, their unguarded emotions and thoughts like a balm, distilled happiness absorbed and experienced via osmosis like some psionic vampire. One thing was clear however, as I came across a cow I had stolen, currently chained up as it mooed in terror and tried to avoid me.

As my tentacles reached out and my jaws dripped and all but tore into the cow, I knew I was living on borrowed time and snarled as I measured the aftermath of cow brains. "Bah, barely any sort of change." I was eating popcorn when I wanted steak and speaking of which, I instructed my servants to butcher the corpse and floated away, a quick cantrip cleansing doing the rest.

No sense wasting food after all.

=====

Days passed. I was very careful not to expose myself whenever I felt the psionic signature of an old soul, originating from a bird. Qrow was watching me and whether or not it was due to his own wariness of me around his nieces or perhaps on Ozpin's orders, I didn't know or care to delve deeper. Taiyang had been coming by lately, trying to invite me to dinner as thanks and every time, I had refused. Alter Self could only go so far, and I had no wish to be part of that conversation outside of my protections.

The days passed by in a routine way by now. My golems had excavated the lower foundations, working on establishing and laying out something of a dungeon of my own. My arcane defenses were still attempting to work on Grimm, as Aberration didn't seem to be what they were. Perhaps fiends? Ruby and Yang had all but claimed my yard to play around when I couldn't be bothered, and my Air Elemental kept being summoned when they did. I would have been content, had it not been for this gnawing, psychic starvation I was putting myself through.

I hated the sensation, hated the grumpiness inherent and finally I couldn't help it. If I wanted to have any sort of relief, I would have to hunt for some random drifter and sate myself that way. It'd be easy too, considering the sheer number of villages that kept being crushed by the Grimm. No one would miss some random person, lost and adrift and dead by the Grimm.

And then I'd feel the distant happiness of Ruby and Yang and suddenly, my machinations would horrify me as I grabbed that sliver of humanity, trying desperately to retain myself. Which meant it was time for desperate measures, one way or another.

And if it got that peeping bird off my back, who was I to argue otherwise?

=====

Qrow Branwen was an agent of Ozpin, which sounded a lot cooler on paper than expected. Oh sure, there was a lot of skullduggery, daring stakeouts and desperate fights but most of the time there was nothing but boredom and false trails. Which is why he didn't find it too concerning when he got a scroll message instructing him to visit the old McDonald place, until he actually got there to talk to Mr. Gold McDonald himself.

An old man who specialized in beef, with vast herds and enough protection from the Grimm to qualify for a private army as he spoke, his rough brogue stubbornly kept despite his wealth.

"An' all of em were dead! My hands were all scurred, running and Bessy kept growling, them fur raised like t'God of Darkness hisself was outside!" Qrow, staring out at the field couldn't blame him as the sight imprinted on his eyes.

Dead cows, dead steer. As far as the eye could see. The meat untouched, the corpses everywhere and every one of them, dead in the same way. Through a hole in the head, the inside scooped out like someone had taken a spoon to them as he took a picture.

"And no one saw a thing?"

Gold shook his head. "No, m'hands were screaming about how the wind was killing my herd and we even shot a few times, but nothing. Then suddenly, there was a bright light and it shot into the sky!"

"Where from?" Qrow latched on that, and Gold pointed wordlessly towards his fields on the side as Qrow immediately walked there. Through the corn, through the field he suddenly found himself in the following. A perfect circle of flattened corn, three times the size of Taiyang's home as his eyes grew wider and unbidden, he looked to the sky.

".... No way."

Gold, who had walked with him only nodded furiously. "It's them Aliens! I knew they were real!"

Qrow could already feel his brain cells dying from this assignment and he aided them on their journey, with a drink from his flask.