MTU: Hard To Look At - Chapter 8 (Patreon)

Going to sleep queasy must have been why I had so many nightmares. One particularly vivid one involved me devouring people, my friends and family, like a snake would. I woke rubbing my jaw wondering if it could drop low enough to swallow a human whole.

I felt wrong. The queasiness was gone. But, something was off. I opened my eyes and saw a snake tail. I reached out to touch it and saw that my arm was all scaly green and that my hand was claw-like. The tail was definitely attached to me below my waist, far below my waist.

Panic building, I tore the sheets away from me revealing a thick snake body coiled in bed attached to my waist where my hips use to flare out.

I must have been screaming because suddenly my door was open and Mom appeared. She started to ask something but a second later her body had turned to stone.

My inner eyelids were open? Why couldn't I see the psychedelic colors that I normally saw? I touched my face. It was bumpy, scaly, and felt a bit longer than normal

The urge to touch Mom was great.  I could feel my coils twisting to start moving me toward her. The urge was like a hunger. I needed to feed on that delicious stuff inside the stone. I needed to drain her dry.

I needed to get away. I turned around so I could not see her but every snake on my head was staring at Mom. I opened the window. I grabbed a thick coil of my body and tossed it out the second story window.

There was an odd sense of falling while also being stable on the bed. I pushed more of my body out and was surprised when my tail touched the ground and there were still a few coiled loops in the bed. How long was my snake body? I slid out the window. The desire to grab hold of Mom and drink her vitality down almost got me to climb back in the window.

"Medusa?" Dad called out. "What did you do to..."

I let go of the window and dropped. My upper body landed upright, never touching the ground. I turned and slithered toward the woods behind the house. As I reached the wood line a bird crashed to the ground in front of me made of stone. I reached down without thinking and drank the bird's inner life force. I drained dry a couple more birds and some squirrels before I regained my wits. The squirrel statue in my hand tasted great. I had stopped before draining it dry. I put it down. My eyesight was slowly regaining the strange colors I associated with my trick.

I had little idea how far into the woods I had gone. I turned around by twisting my human torso, lifting it up and around with my snake body, and then pushing forward. My eye height was a few feet higher off the ground compared to my human form. My body trailed behind my torso at least twenty-five feet. It was as thick as my waist for a good ten to twelve feet then slowly tapered down to a few inches thick at the end of my tail. Thankfully, I did not have to think about moving. I just picked a direction and my snake body moved in that direction.

The nightgown I had been sleeping in was in tatters as the straps had broken and it had slipped down around my upper tail. I slid it all the way off and took stock of my body. I was green and scaly all over. My breasts were flatter and nippleless. I used my headsnakes to look at my face. I was no longer pretty due to the scaliness. My nose was less pronounced. My eyes had a yellow glow around them. There were fangs in my mouth. I wondered if I had a venom in this form. Even my tongue was forked.

I wondered if this was a form at all. Was this what I was supposed to be? A monster for real? No, I had to believe I was a metamorph. Anything else would be too hard to live with.

I picked up a pair of stone squirrels. The one I had not drained fully still had lines and swirls within it. The other was a uniform off-white. Returning to the first squirrel, I tried to turn off my trick. After a moment, I could not see the colors in the stone. I looked around. I spotted a squirrel about thirty feet away. I rose up on my body and lunged at the squirrel catching it... ugh, in my mouth. I opened my mouth immediately but not before a warm fluid drained from my jawline into the squirrel. I could feel the venom run along my gum line.

I looked down and the squirrel was lying at my... where my feet should have been. It was not moving. I picked it up with a clawed hand. It was alive but unable to move. I had paralyzed it.

Fascinated, it took a moment to remember I had just lunged thirty feet with amazing accuracy. And I had not turned the squirrel to stone. I guessed it was safe for me to be around humans again. But, I didn’t want to be seen like this. I didn’t want to be seen walking out of the woods naked either.

First, I tried to top on a few more critters. I wanted to be sure I was full. I didn’t drain them dry. But they would probably be statues for days. After another bird and one and a half squirrels, I just could not drink the sweet nectar any more.

I didn’t know what to do next. I looked at myself again and noticed I wasn’t a uniform green color. My skin had the strange tessellations of a snake’s skin. There were patches of light and dark green with copper colored tiles separating the patches. It was really quite striking. Though, at the time, I wasn’t happy about it. The sun was high in the sky and I realized I had no idea how so many hours had gone by. Mom and Daddy were probably worried. At least Mom should no longer be a statue by now. I slithered back to the tree line. I wondered how fast I was moving. It seemed very fast.

At the tree line I had to slither a few houses to the right to get to my backyard. From behind my house I could see that neither Mom nor Daddy had left for work. So much for sneaking in.

I was going to try transforming when I realized Mom had probably seen my snake body. Resigned, I gathered my courage and broke across the yard. I reached the house in seconds. I opened the back door to the screened-in breezeway and called out, "I'm home," as I entered the kitchen. My head was brushing up against the ceiling.

My voice was lower than normal, still feminine but with a bit of chain smoker in it.

"Medusa?" Mom cried out from the living room and an instant later she was in the kitchen. She pulled up short when saw me. "Oh, I guess I didn't dream it, did I?"

Daddy entered, "Medusa, what happened to you this morning?"

"Well, I discovered I need to feed."

Mom suddenly disappeared and reappeared holding out a pajama top "Could you put this on before you continue?"

I laughed as I took the top and put it on. "I think I also figured out why I have an aversion to pants." I rose slightly showing off my distinct lack of legs. I told them about my morning, about feeling queasy the day before, about the nearly dozen birds and squirrels permanently petrified in the woods. I also mentioned the bird I had drank from yesterday.

When I was done they scolded me for not telling them everything. But, they seemed to understand that feeling queasy the first day back to school could easily be confused with nerves.

The doorbell rang. Mom disappeared and reappeared. "It's Elliot. Should I send him away?"

"No," I replied. "Send him around back." I looked at the clock in dread. How had it gotten so late? How much time had I spent in the woods?

She disappeared again. She returned with a long robe. "In case you find yourself transformed and nude."

I waited a moment before going out into the backyard. Elliot came around the corner and stopped dead. "Medusa, what happened?"

"Let's head into the woods where fewer people can see me." I started telling him about my day. We only went a little ways into the woods before finding a small collection of stone wildlife. "I was afraid of that."

"What?"

"I told my parents I killed maybe ten little animals. There's seven or eight here and I know I stopped more than once to feed."

"Wonderful. You didn't ask me into the woods for privacy, or for freaky sex, but to find out how much you ate."

"Looking like this you still went for the sex joke?"

"Would you prefer that I run out of the woods screaming 'Monster'? Frankly, being called a monster all these years has obviously affected you deeply. What you never seemed to have learned is the monster isn't defined by its looks. It's defined by its deeds. You don't have a monstrous bone in any of your bodies. You regret killing these animals. A monster wouldn't care." He reached around my waist and hugged me.

I slid backwards and down so I could rest my head on his shoulder. And suddenly I was crying. My body was shaking. He held me tight. I don't know how long I cried. After a while I noticed he was talking.

"It'll be alright. Crying is good."

I felt comfortable. The next thing I knew I had picked my head up and kissed him on the lips.

He jerked his head back and put a finger to my lips. "Not like this," he chastised me.

"I'm sorry," I sniffled. "I forgot how ugly I look."

"You moron," he declared. "I don't mean like this in reference to how you look. I mean how vulnerable you are like this. How would I ever forgive myself if I took advantage of you?"

I cried again. I did not deserve such a friend. After a while I stopped crying. He picked up my head. "Do you want to go home or shall we resume our tour of the small animal statuary annex?"

I laughed. "I need to know how much I ate." We found four more small clearings with six to ten statues of bird, squirrels, and the occasional opossum, skunk, or porcupine. In the last clearing we found the remains of the squirrel I had paralyzed.

Elliot asked me how I caught the squirrel. I demonstrated by snatching a bird in flight with a powerful lunge. I ended up paralyzing the bird in the same way. "Feathers do not taste good."

"I would assume not," Elliot agreed. "We should head back. It's already after five. Are you bringing the bird back to time your venom? "

"I suppose,” I said. “These three I didn’t drain dry. I was in control when I only drank a little.”

“They’re probably safe here. You don’t know when you drained them so we can’t really learn anything from them.”

“Probably.”

We walked in silence to the edge of the woods. When I hesitated to leave the woods he asked what was wrong.

"I think I should walk the rest of the way."

"Okay," he said expectantly. After a pause, he added, "Should I look away?"

I nodded and said, "I don't know if I can switch back. I'm also worried about losing control of my trick as I change since I couldn't control it this morning."

"That was probably caused by your need to eat. I'll wait twenty feet away looking the other way so you'll be private, but not alone." He turned to walk away.

I said, "Wait, don't turn around."

"If this is when you devour me, I will be sorely disappointed. The clearing with the animal statues was where it was supposed to happen."

I tossed the robe over his head, "Just hold my robe so transforming doesn't damage it." As he continued away from me I added, "And if I ever need to kill you, I'll be sure to give you a genre appropriate death." I watched him walk away and sit down facing away. It was all up to me now.

I imagined myself as I was. I imagined transforming. I imagined I could be here all night though this body would not get cold. I tried imagining harder. I felt silly. I activated my trick. I tried visualizing how I looked now. I tried visualizing my human form. I still felt silly.

I tried visualizing me without form. I concentrated and it was like the world shifted. I immediately imagined standing here in the woods. I felt locked in place as my tail shrank, split, and turned into legs. My arms shortened and the hands lost their claws. I could feel my breasts fill out. My face itched.

When I could move, I called out,  "It worked! I'll be right there. Don't you dare turn around."

"I won't," he called back holding up the robe awkwardly behind him.

I closed the distance between us and took the robe. I turned around as I put my arms in the sleeves. I pulled the trim tight around my middle and tied the belt. "Okay, I'm at least decent now."

He turned around. "After all this running around, I bet you would like a nice hot bath. I'll run interference with your folks while you rush upstairs," he suggested.

"A quick shower will do if you want to wait for me," I countered as we headed for the breezeway back door.

"Okay," he said. He entered the kitchen first and began, "What we found in the woods was interesting and I'm going to tell you all about it while Medusa goes and gets washed up."

I entered and spoke as I walked through the room, "I'll be down as soon as I get the smell of the woods off me."

Elliot continued, "We found twenty-seven statues of small animals in the woods. She will need to find a better source..."

I couldn’t hear the rest of what was said. I didn’t want to hear it at all. I quickly entered the bathroom and closed the door. I reeked of dirt and moss. I turned the shower on and hurried inside. The water was cool and dirt was already puddling in the shower. I pulled a few twigs and leaves from between my hairsnakes. I tried to figure out how freaked out I should be over being a thirty-foot long snake-woman most of the day.

The soap was done clearing away the visible dirt. It did little to clean the guilt away. Twenty-seven dead forest animals. When will I need to do that again? Will I start looking for larger prey? There are a few dogs in the neighborhood. Would their nectar taste better?

Reluctantly, I turned the water off and dried off. Wrapping the towel around me, I crossed the hallway to my room and put on a new set of pajamas. I retrieved the robe from the bathroom and brought it down to the laundry room before returning to the kitchen.

Daddy was talking, "... can find a better supply of animals." He looked up as I entered. "How are you feeling, Honey?"

"Great physically," I admitted. "Morally a wreck and emotionally taxed."

"One out of three is a good batting average," Elliot quipped.

Daddy ignored him, saying, "I understand the last one and I suppose the first one makes sense. We need to discuss that middle one. What have you done that's amoral?"

"Killing indiscriminately," I pointed out, pacing around the room.

"That's not what you did."

"You weren't there," I cried. "I don't remember most of it. I just killed and ate and if you had been there you'd be dead. All of you!"

"You didn't drain me," Mom said simply. "You fled. You saved me from your so-called rampage."

"I almost didn't," I whimpered.

"Almost doesn't matter. Doing matters."

"We just need to make sure it doesn't get to the point of desperation like it apparently did this time," Daddy added.

"You said you were queasy yesterday morning," Mom began. "We need to see how long it is until you feel queasy again to determine how often you must consume this whatever it is."

"Fine," I said. "I don't want to think about it any more." I walked out the door to the breezeway. I entered the garage and plopped myself down at my work bench.

Elliot followed a moment later. He picked up the tape and handed it to me as he pulled the tape out and walked to the far side of the room.

"I don't want to do this," I declared.

"You don't know the plan yet," he replied, handing me the tape measure. "We, including the valley girl doctor at the Clinic, have been measuring your maximum range. That's the mistake. You need to see that you are only as monstrous as you allow yourself to be. We are going to work on your minimums. I believe that if you practice you can learn to use your trick selectively. In fact, I'm willing to spend a lot of time standing around like a statue so that someday you will be able to petrify a bird I am holding without affecting me."

"Seriously?" I asked. "You have a lot of unfounded faith in my abilities."

"That's what friends are for," he replied. "Now stand twenty feet away, kick on your trick and head toward me. Concentrate on not petrifying anyone, especially me. Visualize me remaining flesh and blood as you continue forward. You control the trick. It doesn't control you."

I waited a moment before submitting to the task at hand. I concentrated on believing my trick obeyed me and would not affect Elliot.

He continued the pep talk until he was cut off mid-sentence, petrifying in an instant. I clicked the lock on the tape measure and read the distance aloud, "Thirteen feet, four inches." I was flabbergasted. "You were right, Elliot!" I exclaimed.

I walked up to Elliot. I looked at his mouth head-on and from the side. I giggled. "Petrifying talking people leaves them with funny shaped mouths."

"It's good to hear you laugh," Daddy said, entering unexpectedly.

"I suppose it's just good to be laughing," I agreed.

"So what was this experiment?"

I explained the premise and initial success of the experiment.

"That's great," Daddy said. He waved his arm toward himself. "Let's take a little walk. Elliot will probably prefer that time passes quickly."

I followed Daddy out through the breezeway to the front yard and we sat down on the porch steps.

"I know Elliot is enthusiastic and willing to help. But, I hope that's all he wants."

I stopped Daddy right there, "Please don't. Elliot is well aware that I think of him as a brother."

"Good, good," he responded. "How about what I asked that first night. Anything to report?"

I thought about it for a moment. "It's funny," I began. "When you asked me to gather data on the other team, I didn't think it would be difficult to tell of my discoveries. Spending this morning as a half-snake hybrid makes how I feel now not only more palatable but also more natural. Being a guy now feels like the other team. I knew someday I might come to feel that way. But, I feel that way now. And while I could tell you what things are like, it feels awkward telling my Daddy about my body."

"I was afraid of that."

"You've spent the last few years drilling it into my head that the person I was may not be the person I become. Aren't you glad I've taken one of your life lessons to heart?" As he stared at me I could not help but giggle girlishly.

“It's every parent's dream come true. But, apparently, I should have also drilled in that being comfortable talking about the changes would also be good.”

I laughed. We talked some more. I found out we had an appointment at the Clinic tomorrow. Once Elliot was back. Daddy suggested we verify our findings by having him and Elliot standing in front of me while I tried not to affect one of them. I had decided to protect Elliot. Daddy was petrified at sixteen feet. When Elliot reached ten feet I closed my eyes and turned off my trick.

"I'm starting to feel a strain. I don't see the point of petrifying you twice tonight. Why don't you head home so I can get some rest?" I pleaded.

Elliot asked if I was sure I would be alright before leaving.

I went back into the house and found Mom in the kitchen wolfing down her bedtime snack.

I turned one of the kitchen chairs away from her and sat down facing away from her. I commented, "I wonder if how you feel about eating these extra meals is similar to how I should feel about devouring all those animals."

"How do you think I feel about eating so much?" She asked between bites.

"You always do it when no one is around. I've always assumed you would be embarrassed if someone watched."

"Is that why you're facing away from me? Even though I know you can see through your hairsnakes?" She laughed. "Turn around, Dear. I would prefer company to eating alone."

"But..." I started helplessly.

"I eat alone so that you and your father don't feel obligated to join me. My sisterquickly gained like thirty pounds in the first month after my twist because she thought I felt funny having to eat so much."

"I didn't know," I said, turning my chair around.

"Well, she swore us to secrecy when I had you. There are no pictures of her from that time any more." She got up and added more cereal to her bowl.

I learned more about how Mom's twist affected her life that evening than I had ever known. And I had thought I understood her completely beforehand.