Family Fued: Eggman Edition (Sonic the Hedgehog) (Patreon)

The lights shined brightly on the colorful and wacky looking stage before the contestants of the two families at play here. It was already starting off as a rather interesting experience from both ends of the spectrum.

For one, signing up for this thing was a hassle. Sonic had two brothers but that was about it as far as family he could turn to for immediate assistance. Finding two other people to join his team wasn’t the easiest thing in the world. 

Silver seemed excited to learn more about the customs of the past and a game show was something he’d never experienced before. Sonic thought that might be detrimental to the idea of winning but was too much of a softie to deny him the experience. Plus, he was kind of cute. Maybe he could pass as someone’s boyfriend or something.

Then somehow Amy caught wind of the plan to go on there. She offered to be his “wife” but he settled on “girlfriend in name only” and she reluctantly agreed.

Now here they were on the game of Family Feud! It was Sonic’s family versus the family across from them who were coming out on stage now.

“Whoa… small world…” Sonic remarked when he took a look at them.

It was basically Team Chaotix but with two old groupies with them this time.

“We’re making that money today boys,” Vector said, hand on the table.

Charmy was blowing bubbles with his mouth as Espio stood with his arms crossed. “Sure. I’ll offer a silent prayer for our victory.”

The last two members, Mighty and Ray, stood beside them with a sideways glance at the crocodile.

“It’s been a while since we’ve hung out but last I heard you were still hard up for cash? Is this truly going to help any?” Mighty asked. He and Ray were pretty much nomads. He had no real idea what the Chaotix Detective Agency did for money.

“It will so long as we win,” Vector said with a grit of his teeth.

The families were set.

It was Sonic, Tails, Manic, Silver, and Amy Vs. Vector, Charmy, Espio, Ray, and Mighty.

Manic leaned over to Sonic with his eyes narrowed and a small grin on his face. “You know, if it’s money you want, I could have just snagged it from backstage or whatever.”

“I don’t. This is just for fun so keep your hands to yourself Mr. Slick.” Sonic said.

“Not to worry. My brain is an impenetrable fortress. This’ll be in the bag,” Tails smiled.

“I’m no slouch either,” Amy said. “In fact, I might even know more about everyday living than you guys.”

“Ohhh~! I can’t wait,” Silver’s eyes gleamed as he bounced up and down where he was. He was just happy to be along for the ride.

The music played, blaring those weird horns signaling the start of the game, and then an announcer started to stammer out some words at the contestants.

“W-Welcome to Family Feud… and now here’s your host… uhm… D-Doctor Eggman…!”

“What?!” Amy asked.

“Que?” Charmy said.

“Who?” Ray blinked.

Eggman came out on stage, waving and getting a very confused sounding applause. He stood up to the podium, wearing his new suit and placed his hands on it with his cue cards in hand.

“Hello everyone and welcome to Family Feud. As of a few minutes ago, I’m your host Doctor Eggman. Mr. Harvey’s taking a bit of a nap right now,” Eggman said, grinning from ear to ear as he held up his hand in a short wave towards everyone.

“Now wait just a minute! You can’t–!” Sonic was about to spring out and attack him but Eggman pressed a small button that sent an electric current through the hedgehog’s body! “BZZZZRRRK!”

His eyes crossed as he jittered and shook before he fell to the ground.

“SONIC?!” Tails and Amy looked surprised before both glaring at Eggman.

“Hey! He signed a contract. No attacking the host,” Eggman defended himself. “There are several little nanobots floating about the room right now. If any of you get out of line they’re going to do what they do. I don’t make up the rules, I just enforce them.”

“Y-You don’t?” Silver asked. “Was Family Feud always this dangerous?” Silver blinked.

Sonic clawed his way back up and spat a smoke ring out of his mouth before grunting with a rattled voice. “F-Fine… let’s play it your way Egghead…”

“Y-You okay bro?” Manic asked.

“I’m fine…” Sonic said. His pants were a bit damp but there was no need to give them an excuse to look down.

“Alright then!” Eggman laughed as he held up his first card. “I’ll explain the rules of Family Feud. Or at least the rules of this first section of the game. I’ll ask one family member from each team to come up to the podium and face off on the first question. The contestant who buzzes in first gets to provide the first answer. If that answer is the No. 1 response then his or her family gets control of the question. If not then the opposing contestant gets to try and provide a higher-ranking response to earn control for his or her family.”

“Control of the question eh?” Silver rubbed his chin.

“Seems fairly normal,” Mighty muttered.

“OH! This’ll be the Eggmanland Edition of Family Feud so each question wrong will see a penalty happen related to the question asked,” Eggman sneered and his glasses flashed.

Charmy ducked his head down a bit. “Gulp…”

“That son of a…” Sonic muttered, squirming a bit. He didn’t like being damp…

Eggman pointed his finger out to the camera. “If there’s no objections, or even if there are, we shall now begin!”

The goofy music played again as the doctor pointed at the two families. “Call your first family members up to the podiums!”

Tails raised his hand and Sonic nodded. “Might as well start off strong.”

“Well?” Espio asked.

“I’ll go. Might as well take initiative as the team leader, I suppose.” Vector shrugged and marched his way up there as well.

Eggman looked between them and held up his first card. “Alright you troglodytes, listen up. I’m going to ask you a question. You give me an answer and whoever answers closest to the No. 1 survey answer for that question shall win. The surveys are all out of 100 people so you’ll have a good idea if you did good or not based on the numbers that appear on the screen behind me.”

Tails and Vector nodded and stared each other down. The time for asking why Eggman wanted to host a game of Family Feud had clearly passed them by. They were here to win.

“First question,” Eggman’s grin remained wide. “Name things you bring on a camping trip!”

Tails and Vector both shot for the buzzer.

Tails hit it first!

“Tails!” Eggman pointed.

“A tent!” Tails said.

“Survey says!” Eggman points at the screen.

DING! A tent came on screen as the highest answer with 36 votes.

Tent - 36

“Sheesh…” Vector grumbled.

“Sonic’s family now has control of the question!” Eggman said. “More responses please! Keep them coming!”

Tails sighed. “Okay. Uh… matches!”

A loud buzzer sounded. That was strike one.

“Dammit…” Tails grumbled. Vector looked as calm as could be. Inside he was a bit annoyed though.

Tails kept thinking, “Uhm… no, not firewood…”

“Survey SAYS!” Eggman shouted.

The loud buzzer sounded again. That was strike two.

“Hey! I didn’t actually mean to say firewood!” Tails snapped.

“Tails, stop talking out loud! You know Eggman’s an asshole,” Sonic shouted.

Eggman pressed his buzzer and Sonic got another 10,000 volts into his body. 

“BLAKLAKGGHHKL!” Sonic screeched and flopped to the floor again.

“Toilet Paper!” Tails tried again.

Silence.

Then a DING!

Toilet Paper - 8

“Only eight?!” Tails gasped. “Oh come on. That’s the most important thing.”

“Perhaps for a trumpet butt like you,” Eggman sneered. The fox blushed and narrowed his eyes.

“Swiss Army Knife!” Tails blurted out.

The buzzer sounded again.

“Strike three, you’re out!” Eggman said. “Now then, Vector, he’s got three strikes and two answers. All you need to do to win the round is guess the next highest answer on the board.” He said, putting an arm around the crocodile.

“No foolin’?” Vector smirked and rubbed his chin.

Tails looked annoyed. He began sweating a bit. The odds of Vector picking the next literal highest answer were slim but it was also bad that he only had to answer once to win the round…

“Sleeping bag,” Vector said finally.

“Survey says!” Eggman pointed at the screen.

There was silence again. Then a loud ding.

Sleeping Bag - 21

“You’ve done it!” Eggman said, shaking the croc’s hand. “Congratulations! You’ve won round one!”

“Hahahaha! Excellent! I’ve always been known as the comeback king!” Vector laughed.

“YEAAAAH!” Charmy and Ray cheered while Espio and Mighty clapped their hands along with the crowd. They were finally getting into this after the initial shock of seeing Eggman there died down.

“Let’s see what the other answers were,” Eggman turned to the screen.

Backpack -12

Food/S’mores - 11

Bug spray/sunscreen - 7

Compass - 5

Tails grumbled. “Whatever…” He was about to slump away when Eggman put a hand on his shoulder.

“Not to worry my dear fox fellow. You’ve won yourself a nice penalty,” Eggman said. “It’s time for this fox to go camping!”

“What… go camping? Right now?” Tails blinked in confusion.

Suddenly, two Egg Pawns came out on stage with a huge trolly of items on it. Tails, before he even knew what was happening was brought over to where the supplies were. It was everything that was on the board for the answers of the game.

“Enjoy yourself, Tails. First we have a nice selection of S’mores for you to enjoy,” Eggman grinned as Tails’ arms were grabbed and a bib was placed around his neck.

“Eh? W-Wait a second! I-I’m not hung-BLEGH!” Tails’ eyes crossed when crackers, melted chocolate, and marshmallows were shoveled into his mouth by the hands of the robots.

“Unfortunately, we couldn’t get actual chocolate so the Ex-lax on sale had to suffice,” Eggman said, with a fake frown at the camera.

“MMMMMFFF????!!!” Tails began sweating as his tummy rumbled, almost immediately.

“To help with his camping experience we also got bug spray to ward off those pesky flies that might want his delicious S’mores.” Eggman said, approaching the fox and spraying him all over. “Unfortunately, it’s a scent that attracts acid spewing wasps instead.”

He then opened the backpack on the table and a torrent of the bugs he mentioned flung out and attacked the poor boy.

“MMMMMMFFFF!” Tails jumped out of the robot's grasp in fear as they circled around his body, melting his clothes and stinging him all over! His mouth was glued shut thanks to the marshmallows and the ex-lax but he ran around in circles as his clothes disintegrated down to his Care Bears briefs.

With teary eyes, he grabbed his butt, feeling the intense pressure building up, and tried to run off but jumped and felt his body loosen to an extensive level. The sound of a loud, embarrassing messing was heard over the speakers and witnessed by the crowd right before the poor boy ran off the stage with the angry wasps following him.

Everyone stared in shock and awe as that happened.

Sonic in particular turned to leer at Eggman with a grumpy look on his face… and much more than damp pants on now.

“Hey, let’s continue shall we?” Eggman asked.

Team Sonic - 0

Team Chaotix - 3

“We’re going to demolish him after this right?” Amy asked, lifting her hammer.

“Oh yeah. He’s not coming out of this without his egg shell cracked wide open,” Sonic said, clenching and unclenching his fists.

Meanwhile, the Chaotix were pretty happy at the moment.

“Whoo. Glad that worked out. Would have looked real bad if I set a bad precedent at the start,” Vector said, sounding relaxed. “Especially as the leader.”

“Poor Tails,” Charmy sighed. “I’ll give him a shoulder rub when I come over for our next play date.”

“Hey, uh, yeah, about Tails,” Ray spoke up. “Are you sure we want to just allow Eggman to give out weird penalties like that?”

“If it’s the rules of the game then sure,” Espio shrugged. “I embrace the challenge.”

Mighty winced. “I’m not sure if we were given fair enough warning for it though…”

“Round two!” Eggman snapped his fingers. “Hurry up! We don’t have all day!”

“My turn!” Amy said, pretty annoyed already.

“Good luck…” Sonic said with a wave. Eggman was crazy so he hoped she’d be alright.

“I guess I shall press my luck next,” Espio said, heading on up.

“Good luck Espio,” Charmy called out. “Un-spring that tail of yours for extra, extra good luck.”

Espio had no clue what that meant but it didn’t matter. His tail didn’t even really work that way.

The two competitors stood across from one another as Eggman eyed them both.

“Alrighty then! The next question is this…!” Eggman cleared his throat. “Name things you spend lotto winnings on!”

Espio and Amy went for the buzzer at seemingly the same time but much to Amy’s chagrin she failed to buzz in first.

“Yes, Espio!” Eggman pointed at the chameleon.

Espio felt like he knew this since he’d had an open ear to the kinds of things Vector wanted to buy.

“A brand new car,” Was the first thing out of Espio’s mouth.

Silence. Then a DING!

Cars - 19

“Good answer but it wasn’t the highest one so Amy gets to ask for something better,” Eggman said, turning to the girl.

“Ah. I see…” Amy rubbed her chin. “Well, then, I’ll say expensive clothes.”

“Expensive clothes eh?” Eggman raised a brow. “Survey says!”

Silence.

Then a buzzer!

“WHAT?!” Amy snapped. “Who did this survey? A bunch of nudists?!”

“Espio, we’re going back to you. Amy failed to capitalize on her chance to steal the question.” Eggman said.

“A mansion,” Espio said next.

“Survey says!” Eggman pointed at the screen.

DING

Mansions - 25

“Mansions, plural…” Espio muttered. “People sure are greedy.”

“That was the top answer so you’ve got control of the question,” Eggman said.

“Oh COME ON!” Amy stomped her foot.

“A pool.” Espio said.

Eggman looked at the screen. “Survey says?”

A buzzer sounded.

“Sheesh…” Espio grumbled. He was struggling to think of anything.

“I dunno… a vacation?” Espio asked again.

DING!

Vacations - 23

“That was the second highest answer,” Eggman grinned.

“A vacation sounds nice…” Espio said.

Amy just leered at him and tapped her foot.

“Keep going,” Eggman said.

“I don’t know what people like… uh… a football field?” Espio shrugged.

“A… football… field…?” Eggman stammered. “Survey says?”

BUZZ!

“Yeah, of course not,” Eggman muttered.

“I wouldn’t put it past people,” Espio said.

“That’s two strikes,” Eggman held up his hand. “You fail this next one and Amy gets to try again to steal all your points with her last try.”

“... A… uh…” Espio’s head began to steam.

“Come on! Think! What would I want?!” Charmy exclaimed.

“... A vending machine?” Espio asked.

BUZZ!

“Goddammit,” Espio turned and headed back to the bench. Vector clapped nonetheless.

“You can still win the round if Amy gets her answer wrong though,” Vector said.

“Indeed,” Eggman turned to Amy. “Well? Will you steal the win?”

“Hmph,” Amy crossed her arms. “I’m going to guess high modern art like statues or something to decorate the mansions they buy with!”

“Ah. Good answer,” Eggman said. “But is it on the board? Survey says…!”

Silence.

BUZZ!

“GAAAAH!” Amy screamed and tugged at her hair.

Eggman had to laugh. “The Chaotix win again. Let’s see what the other answers were!”

Pay off debts – 20

Education – 10

Start a company – 3

“Pay off debts would have been one of my answers, definitely.” Vector said.

“Uh-huh,” Mighty shook his head with a small smile.

Team Sonic - 0

Team Chaotix - 6

“This game is so unfair! It sucks!” Amy snapped.

“Yeah, maybe, but only because you lost. It’s time you got to experience the luxury of winning the lotto now though Amy,” Eggman grinned, pressing a button.

“Huh?” Amy was momentarily confused before a panel on the floor sprung her out of the building through the ceiling, leaving her dress behind!

“Let’s watch her miraculous vacation as it plays out, folks,” Eggman said, turning to the screen.

Amy was screaming and flailing her arms and legs about as she soared across the sky in her Dora the Explorer panties. She slammed through a billboard that said it was advertising a vacation to the wonderful rolling hills of the Seaside before she slammed into a window, cross-eyed and tongue out like a dope.

The people inside the building saw this panty clad girl smack against their window and rushed towards it to snap pictures.

She then slid off the window and landed into the empty seat of a two-seated stroller. With her eyes rolling and stars circling her head, the baby sat in the seat next to her began giggling.

The person pushing the stroller saw this but shrugged and pushed them both into the daycare center. She’d likely be well taken care of for the rest of the day.

“Amy’s off to get some much needed re-education it looks like…” Eggman said back in the Family Feud area. He took her wallet from her dress and stuffed it into his pocket. “Next round!”

“Alright!” Manic said, standing up. “I’m not letting the gap get wider! It’s time we took them down!”

“Go get 'em little bro. We’re rooting for you,” Sonic said with a thumbs up.

Manic winked and marched his way over to the podium.

“Who wants to-?” Vector began.

“Ooo! Ooo! ME! ME! I wanna go this time! Please?!” Charmy asked, practically bouncing with excitement.

“... Alright… I guess so,” Vector sighed. The six point lead was a comfortable enough reason to gamble right?

“YAY!” Charmy didn’t seem to care that the rent was on the line. He flew on up to the podium and stood across from Manic as Eggman prepared the next question.

“Alright losers, this next question is… name foods that go with Peanut Butter!” Eggman said.

Manic made a weirded out face.

Charmy just grinned.

“Alright… go!” Eggman said.

They both reached for the buzzer but Charmy was that much faster.

“P.P and J!” Charmy blurted out.

“Peanut Butter and Jelly eh?” Eggman said slyly. “I guess that would naturally come to mind first.”

Charmy confidently rubbed his chest with his fist.

“Survey says…!” Eggman pointed at the screen.

DING!

Jelly - 43

“YAAAAAAY!” Charmy cheered along with the crowd and his clapping team.

“Oh come on,” Manic muttered. “That was a steal…” He said, not recognizing the irony of a thief complaining about theft.

“That was the top answer, clearly, so you have control of the question. We’re going until you get three buzzes.” Eggman said. “You ready?”

“Yup! Yuppers!” Charmy nodded vigorously.

“Alright. Go for it you loony bastard child,” Eggman muttered.

“Chocolate.” Charmy said.

“Survey says…!” Eggman pointed at the screen.

DING!

Chocolate - 27

“HAHAHAHA!” Charmy bounced up and down with excitement, fists in the air.

Manic just pouted.

“Apples,” Charmy said next, stopping his dance momentarily.

“Apples?” Manic asked.

BUZZ!

“What? Peanut Butter goes great with Apples!” Charmy exclaimed.

“First buzz,” Eggman warned.

“Darnit… uh… crackers?” Charmy asked.

BUZZ!

“GAH! Uh… uh…?! P-Peanuts?” Charmy asked.

“... Eating peanut butter… with peanuts…?” Eggman asked. “Survey says…!”

BUUUZZZZ!”

“OH NOOO!” Charmy whined, slumping over the podium.

“Manic, you have one chance to guess something correct on the board and you can steal all the points from Charmy,” Eggman said.

“Uh.. hmm…” Manic pondered things for a bit.

Charmy sweated. He got two of the three highest answers but got three strikes before he could get the third highest. He didn’t want Manic to win…

“Oreos?” Manic asked.

“Survey says…!” Eggman pointed at the screen.

DING!

Oreos - 8

“Haha! Manic takes it!” Eggman said.

The crowd cheered as Manic flexed for them all and gave a thumbs up to Sonic.

“OHHHH! COME ONNNN!” Charmy whined and banged his fists on the podium.

“Eh… I guess it wasn’t as bad as we thought…?” Vector said with a shrug.

“The other answers please…” Eggman said.

Bananas – 14

Oats – 4

Celery – 3

“Bananas?! They chose bananas over apples?!” Charmy snapped.

“Yup. Wanna taste?” Eggman asked.

“Uh… huh?” Charmy blinked, momentarily confused.

A small cannon was then rolled out on stage by two Egg Pawns and pointed directly at the bee’s behind. He wasn’t facing them so he was confused.

He got the surprise of his life when it was fired and an unpeeled banana shot directly up his butt, ripping through the jeans he had on.

“DOOOOOOOGUUUUH!” Charmy’s eyes widened and his mouth formed an “O” shape as he got a surprise insertion.

The cannon they had fired more stuff at him. He got pelted with oats, celery stalks, oreos, and blasts of chocolate and peanut butter.

It rained into him like sharp bullets so his clothes were torn asunder by the bullet spray of the food.

When the cannon stopped spinning, the bee was a mess! He was in just his MLP briefs, wobbling in place, coated in gross food stuffs and paste, eyes rolling, and tongue out.

“Apples over bananas! Whooo!” He cheered, shaking his butt with a derpy look on his face for the crowd.

Then he passed out, face planting the peanut butter and oreo bits with his huge butt on display.

“... That was…” Ray began.

“REALLY embarrassing, yeah,” Espio nodded.

“Is he gonna be okay?” Mighty asked.

“It’s a weekly, almost daily, occurrence for him. He never gets used to it though so… probably not,” Vector shrugged. “At least he didn’t wet hi–”

Charmy began wetting himself on the spot.

“Ah. There it is,” Vector sighed, scratching his head.

Team Sonic - 3

Team Chaotix - 6

“Next! This’ll be the final round before the capper for the game!” Eggman snickered. He was clearly having fun.

“Okay! Okay! Then it’s my turn then! You’ll be our finisher Sonic,” Silver said, bouncing his way up to the podium, radiating excitement.

“Go for it bud,” Manic said, high fiving Sonic when he came back over. “Remember, the points go to the luckiest sometimes. Don’t fret over things too much.”

“Will do… erm, won’t do… uhm… gah,” Silver grumbled.

“My turn then…” Mighty said.

“No, wait, maybe we should save you for last?” Ray asked. “I think that last round is going to matter more than this one will, so I might as well go now.”

“... Whatever makes you feel the most comfortable, I guess.” Mighty shrugged and gave Ray a little encouraging butt smack.

“Eep!” Ray blushed but smiled, making his way over to the podium. “Haha! Alright! Who’s ready to end up all embarrassed by the penalty. Is it YOU future boy?!” Ray asked, wiggling his eyebrows up and down, spewing confidence that didn’t seem to be there before. He was probably saving it for the occasion though.

It worked towards intimidating Silver a bit. The hedgehog actually gulped.

“Uh… s-sure…” Silver moaned.

“Alright. The next question is… name holidays that involve gifts.” Eggman said.

Silver buzzed first despite Ray’s bravado.

“AGH!” Ray was shocked that happened.

“Christmas!” Silver exclaimed. He did his research. Christmas sounded like so much fun!

“Survey says…!” Eggman raised his finger.

DING!

Christmas - 35

“Obviously that was the highest answer so Silver gets control of the question,” Eggman said.

Ray’s jaw dropped.

Silver kept going.

“Valentine’s Day.”

DING!

Valentines - 18

“Already, that’s two of the highest answers.” Eggman said.

“Hanukkah.” Silver said.

“Survey says…?”

BUZZ!

“Agh. Kwanzaa?” Silver tried again.

“How about Kwanzaa?” Eggman asked.

BUZZ!

“That’s two dings and two buzzes. The next buzz that happens will allow Ray to steal,” Eggman said.

Ray gave Silver a sly grin. Silver sweated.

“Uh… M-Mothers Day?”

“Survey Says…!” Eggman raised his hand.

DING!

Mothers/Fathers Day - 8

“It’s on the board but it isn’t one of the highest answers so the round isn’t yours yet,” Eggman said.

Ray was fidgeting. “Come on… fail… fail…” He chanted quietly to himself.

Silver rubbed his chin. He was planning on saying Fathers Day next but they were grouped together. Made sense…

“Hmm… Birthdays?” Silver shrugged. He couldn’t think of anything else. Technically they weren’t holidays right?

“Birthdays… hmm… is that considered a holiday by our survey’s standards? What’s it say?” Eggman asked.

Silence.

Then a loud DING!

Birthdays - 32

“Why it’s our second highest answer!” Eggman exclaimed.

Ray’s eyes were wide as saucers and his jaw was just seemingly permanently unhinged.

“That means Silver wins the round!” Eggman said.

“YES! HAHAHAHA! In your face!” Silver pointed at Ray, who’s lip quivered a bit.

“Let’s see the last answer on the board,” Eggman exclaimed.

Anniversary - 5

“I guess birthdays and anniversaries count. Who’d have thunk it?” Eggman said.

“AGH! NO FAIR! I DIDN’T EVEN GET A CHANCE TO SAY ANYTHING!” Ray snapped, throwing a tantrum as he jumped up and down.

“Not to worry. You’ll get plenty of time to say stuff on your upcoming mission to spread joy to everyone around the city right now,” Eggman said, snapping his fingers.

Ray was momentarily confused before he was hit with a weird beam of light.

In a flash he was in a diaper with a pink baby bonnet, a sash around his chest that read, “Stupid Cupid” and he had a collection of soft pink bows in a sling on his back.

“Now off you go Stupid Cupid. Here’s your cue card!” Eggman handed Ray an index card that read “Hi! I’m Stupid Cupid! Allow me to do a diaper butt dance and sing an embarrassing song for you for free! Flash photography and high definition video is preferred for my performance because I am a massive idiot!”

Ray clutched the card in his hand while shaking all over. “I… I can’t do this…!”

Eggman snapped his fingers and a pair of angry Dark Chao with chainsaws came out from behind the stage.

“AAAAAAAAH!” Ray screamed, soaking his diaper as he ran off to the left. The Dark Chao chased after him towards the streets. “I’LL DO IT! I’LL DO IT! PLEASE CALL THEM OFF ALREADY!”

His voice disappeared behind the curtain. Eventually, the Dark Chao came back and gave a thumbs up to Eggman… or what looked like a thumbs up based on the shape of their stubby hands.

Team Sonic - 7

Team Chaotix - 6

“Alright. Ray’s out on the town doing his mission as Stupid Cupid. That means the final round is all set,” Eggman said, hands on his hips.

Mighty had been about ready to leap into action at what he just witnessed but Espio put a hand to his shoulder and reminded him of what Ray asked him to do.

Mighty calmed down and sighed. He’d likely see a video of Ray doing that stupid diaper dance and singing a song show up on Youtube later.

As much as he felt for him, that sounded rather adorable.

Sonic stretched and made his way up to the podium along with Mighty.

“This is the last round. This time we’re going to allow for rapid fire answers and buzzes from both of you at the same time,” Eggman said. “It plays out a bit differently on actual Family Feud but screw that, this is MY game. Got it?”

Both Sonic and Manic nodded.

“Alright,” Eggman cleared his throat as the two leered into each other’s eyes. “The question is… name a fictional fantasy book series with a large fanbase! GO!”

“Harry Potter!” Mighty shouted.

DING!

Harry Potter - 27

“Lord of the Rings!” Sonic shouted next.

DING!

Lord of the Rings - 25

“The Chronicles of Narnia!” Mighty shouted next.

BUZZ!

“The Hunger Games!” Sonic yelled.

BUZZ!

“Percy Jackson?” Mighty guessed.

BUZZ!

“Diary of a Wimpy Kid?” Sonic stammered.

BUZZ!

“Captain Underpants?” Mighty suggested.

BUZZ!

“The Walking Dead!” Sonic asked.

“BUZZ!”

“Game of Thrones!” Mighty shouted.

DING!

Game of Thrones - 23

“STOP!” Eggman shouted. “That’s it.”

“What do you mean that’s it?” Sonic asked. “I was gonna say Batman next.”

“You’re wrong,” Eggman snapped.

Sonic pouted.

“All three of the highest answers were guessed. Two of them were grabbed by Mighty with one of them being the top answer. Mighty wins!” Eggman said, raising his hand.

“HUH?!” Sonic gasped, eyes wide with shock.

“Give me what the last answer actually was,” Eggman said.

Twilight - 8

“Eww,” Eggman winced. “Well, whatever.”

The crowd cheered loudly.

Vector clapped hard. “YES! YES! WHOOO! Rent PAID!” He gave a thumbs up. “AHAHAHAHA!”

Espio smiled.

Charmy snored into the peanut butter on the floor.

Team Sonic - 7

Team Chaotix - 9

“Heheh,” Mighty rubbed the back of his head. “Good game?”

“NO WAY!” Sonic shouted. “Ugh! Whatever! Eggman’s getting a beating anyway!”

“Not until I get my money, he isn’t,” Vector chimed in.

“Oh, shut up Vector!” Sonic snapped.

“Yeah! Show some class!” Manic shouted.

“Ugh,” Eggman rolled his eyes. “The losing family is off their rocker. It seems they need a double penalty. CAR BATTERY!” He shouted suddenly.

Manic was confused for a split second before a car battery fell from the ceiling and bashed him on the head!

He fell over and flopped to the ground like a rag doll, instantly cross-eyed and drooling.

“HEY!” Sonic snapped. “You can’t-!”

Eggman pressed his button again and Sonic stopped talking so that he could get several volts of electricity into him once more. He wasn’t just damp. His pants were soaked now!

“Alright. Robots, get out here!” Eggman ordered as he went over to the suitcase of money.

Eggman’s Egg Pawns came out and grabbed Sonic and Manic. The two of them were stripped to their underwear with Manic in his Strawberry Shortcake briefs and Sonic in his Sesame Street ones. They were both wet and getting beaten around. One robot in particular had fun slamming their heads into each other and making them go cuckoo in the face.

“Here you are!” Eggman set the suitcase of actual, real money down in front of Vector.

“HAHA! Got it! Let’s go!” The croc shouted and ran off with it.

“V-Vector! What about Charmy?!” Espio called out.

“We’ll buy a new one! Come on!”

Eggman then turned to wave at the camera. “Thanks for indulging me in this, my latest interest. Tune in next time when I hi-jack Wipe Out! HAHAHAHA!”

In the background, Sonic and Manic were being given around the world wedgies by his robots.

This was the image we fade away on as the music plays us off!

Thanks for watching Family Feud!

—

That was a little fun. I want to do Wipe Out next time if I can though. I wonder what other game shows would work for these losers. Drop me a line if you have any ideas. For now, tell me which downfall you liked the most.