The Great Foam War of 2024 (Patreon)

To the Mayonnaise to my Hedonistic Sandwich, 

My Euphemistic FootFungia, 

In honor of those I have devoured, I wear their skins while lying in wait to make their comrades join them in the sweet relief of temporary foam stinging.  

I can hear the squishing.... the squishing in the dark. 

The fanny packs of ammunition have run out.

All we have for rations are Vienna sausages and Tang.

The world has turned upside down , but at least I have discovered a way to weaponize the Tartar Sauce Packets that we had air dropped. 

I can finally say that I am in my fish sauced element. 

The Marshmallow Peepriarchy now knows me as the " Squishy Fishy Sasquatch " 

Or

As they say in their language

DaGortonsFisherman 

I pray before long I shall be able to cradle your gorgeous feet and clip your toenails with my teeth once more.

As always the Cake Pop to your Fancy Coffee Shop,

Blow kisses at the Skeet that you skeet skeet without me,

Cannon P. Fodder