Catfightsona Part 3 (Patreon)

The girls spent the next couple days resting and strategizing. Dora and Vicky met at Izzy’s house to go over the town map and keep in contact with Gatekeeper (or “Kate” as Dora kept calling her). The oni kept reporting back that there was a long-term infestation in Stella Studebaker’s dreamscape, but that it had still managed to avoid being fully controlled.

“Maybe they’re keeping her as some kind of hideout,” Dora offered. “Like the nest or something?”

“But the lord we found was just sort of corrupted, not completely gone,” Izzy noted. “What if she has some kind of immunity or something we can learn from?”

“I’ve met Stella a bunch of times,” Vicky grunted. “There’s not a lot we can learn from her except how to make her knock this shit off.” 

“So we go in tonight,” Izzy said. “We know where we’re going and should have the lord’s support to travel the land. By all I can figure from his talk and the lay of the land, I think we can make it in one trip if we know where we’re going.”

“And DO we know where we’re going?” Vicky pressed. Izzy tapped on the map and a few notes she had from last time.

“Its roads and buildings loosely line up with the real world. Distance may end up a little funny in there, but with our Catfightsonas at work it shouldn’t be much of a problem. The only thing is...” She pulled out her phone and brought up her weather app. “There’s supposed to be rain the next few days. I don’t know if it’s all perfectly reflected, but that might slow down our travel.”

Vicky scoffed. “If she turned her house into a Japanese castle. I think she can manage to keep the weather in check. Even if she can’t, we’ll at least make some progress.”

It turned out she was right. They arranged their run for that night and Kate was there to wave them into the door. Inside, the pseudo-Asian setup was still there waiting for them with a constant sunset. The guards still recognized them and took them on some horse-drawn carriages. They were jumped by a couple of demon ninjas like the ones from the last time they were at the palace, but they weren’t nearly as concentrated and picked off with a quick punches and shots from their Catfightsonas. 

“Let me tell ya, if we end up getting there and Stella’s already a demon thing, I’m gonna feel real shitty for just sitting here in some hay bale,” Vicky growled.

“It shouldn’t be that long,” Izzy assured her, pulling the map back out. She noted a patch of trees on the map with a pen from her various pockets on her raver outfit’s belt. “At our current rate and assuming that distance is relative like the locations, compared to our normal duration of our visits to the dream realm, we should get there with hours to spare.”

“Do we even know what happens if they lose?” Dora asked, leaning most of the way over the edge of the cart. The locals had recognized them so they didn’t bother with disguises. Izzt averted her eyes as her leotard-wrapped ass wiggling with her short, toned legs. “Like if the temptress takes over?”

“From my consultations with Kate, she made it sound like they take over. A supernatural parasite of sorts. Not like a tick, but  the real big ones. Like the fungus that takes over the brains of ants,” Izzy explained.

“It what?! Ahhh I could have lived my whole lift without knowing that piece of trivia!” Vicky groaned, rubbing her head. “How much longer is this going to take so I can beat some heads in and forget about this shit!?”

“We’re nearly there,” said one of the guards at the front of the carriage. “But we may have a problem. You should see this.”

Izzy leaned over the front where one of them passed her a telescope. She raised it and looked ahead at the kingdom and its walls ahead. The place was fortified as hell! Spiked logs were set up across the roads as barricades, and cannons, archers and catapults were set up on the high walls. Troops and horsemen were all over the place, lining the fields outside the high walls with the huge palace. The building itself was odd, looking old and classy. It was even bigger than the one of the lord they visited last time, but it was far more weathered. It showed old dents, burns and scratches in its walls as if it had been attacked hundreds of times in the past.

“Are they usually this fortified?” Izzy asked as she passed off the telescope to the others. Vicky whistled while Dora just yelped.

“Castle Studebaker is always ready for siege. It’s been through many battles and holds strong against all invaders. It’s why Lady Stella is such a respected leader in these lands. The fact that they’re prepared after we’ve sent word of our arrival beforehand…”

“The Temptress must definitely be in there,” Izzy confirmed.

Dora scanned the place again. “They look like regular guys too. Not the copycat demons. Do we even know how beating up an army of real dream people works in here? Like with our guardian agents policy or anything?”

“Acceptable,” Izzy muttered. “But definitely not healthy for her if we go tearing up Stella’s dreamscape.”

“Even if we do punch our way through a couple hundred armed dream troops,” Vicky grunted as she toyed with her metal pipe. “That’s going to eat up a lot of our time.”

“So we go around them!” Dora suddenly piped up.

“I checked that. It looks like they’ve planned for us to try to flank them already and covered the rear,” Izzy corrected.

“True. But they don’t have magical super-cop friends to help them! Can you guys hop off and undo the horses for a sec?” The guards gave Dora a confused look but climbed off and did as she asked. As soon as it was just the girls on the cart, Dora snapped her badge in half. “Wrestler! Give us a boost, why don’t ya?”

Izzy let out a yelp as the burly woman appeared beneath the cart and hefted it across her shoulders. She lifted it an easy six feet off the ground with a wordless grunt. “”Are you seriously going to just charge through them!?” Izzy blurted.

“Nope. Just hold on tight and get ready for whatever’s inside!” Dora grabbed the wooden edge of of the cart and stooped down, bracing herself as The Wrestler threw the entire vehicle through the air like a missle. It soared over the guards and castle walls, Izzy screaming while Vicky and Dora laughed as the wind blew through their hair. A handful of soldiers fired arrows off at them but they missed the flying, speeding wagon by a mile. 

“Dora you are crazy!” Izzy yelled as she ducked as low as possible.

“Yea! It’s fuckin’ great!” Vicky laughed. “Now hurry up and catch us, Izz!”

“What!? You were counting on ME for that?! What if I wasn’t psycho like you two!” 

“Better learn quick!” Vicky nodded ahead as they soared over the palace walls.

“Dammit! Matron!” She snapped her badge as her catfightsona burst out in a puff of smoke. The busty nun appeared for a moment before her clothes exploded off her body, turning into her cackling dominatrix form. She cracked her whip in an elaborate gesture, spreading her lengthy weapon like a spiderweb pattern between the various columns and statues. The wagon slammed into it, stretching the length of leather but easing to a stop around the second floor within the castle walls.

"Nice!" Vicky cheered as The Wrestler came leaping over the castle walls with similar ease to its throw. A few archers from the walls turned around and aimed at them, but Vicky snapped her badge in half. "Whack 'em for us, Godmother!" The busty mafiosa appeared and unleashed a torrent of blue light from her tommy gun. With their simple weapons, they couldn't match the draw or firing speed of the machine gun as it blasted them all in one sweep of her weapon. Where the blue bolts struck, ice formed around their bodies and hands to keep them from firing. A few stumbled and fell off, but that felt like acceptable losses to Vicky. If Stella was going to lose a few more brain cells out of this, she wouldn't miss them.

"Alright, everybody inside!" Dora barked. Izzy tapped her shoulder and pointed upward. Now that they were closer, they could see past the front tower of the castle. Behind it was the main palace, and at the top was what looked like a naked Stella. She was sealed in a ball of blue energy with flashes of red lightning rushing across it. It looked like the top floor of the castle had been messily ripped off when either it the "dream bubble" was exposed or was somehow dropped on top of it. Dora nodded. "Check that: everybody inside quicker! We're going top floor!"

It was obvious that Stella's dream army was expecting them to rush from the outside; there was almost nobody on the inside to stop them. A few servants shrieked and a handful of guards showed up, some monstrous titty ninjas and some just guys with spears. Neither lasted long as Vicky took point, blasing them with the Godmother and her and Dora picking off any tougher sorts when they got close enough for a pipe to the head or a missile dropkick. They wove through the front tower and with another complex whipping motion, the Matron formed an elaborate and sturdy rope bridge for them to rush into the main castle. A pair of the faceless monster ninja appeared on the edge of the whip's railings to try to cut it loose, but Wrestler barged forward and slammed them into the ground with a double clothesline.

"So it's safe to assume we're going up a tougher specimen than you did last time," Izzy reported as they ran up the last few sets of stairs. "This one seems like it's been here long enough to take root and is either exhausted from working on Stella for this long or it's been draining power from her to get tougher than ever."

"Well lucky for us, there's three of us this time instead of two," Vicky said with a smirk.

"Well one and a half," Dora corrected. "You sort of only got yours at the last minute when you were in Izzy's dream."

As they reached the roof (technically just what remained of the top floor), there was a loud clicking noise. They froze on the spot in case it was a trap, but The Wrestler dove in front of them. There was a huge explosion as Wrestler caught a cannonball the size of a car flying towards them, thick arms struggling with it for a moment before throwing it aside.

"And here I thought I could solve our problems in one go," crowed a scratchy woman's voice from overhead. The girls looked up to see what looked like a giant naked woman around twenty feet tall and wearing nothing but an old wooden warship like a pair of deadly shorts. "Well if you think you're getting through to her, you'll have to deal with me! Ama Mazu!"

"Oh ew," Dora cringed. "Is she wearing that boat like a diaper?"

"Agh! Dor, I can't even stop imagining that now!" Vicky groaned.

"You see, part of my name means the 'lady of the sea' in Japanese! But I'll wave your ignorance and tell you that Mazu was the Chinese goddess of the sea. So my multicultural-"

"She shot us with a cannon and you're arguing about boat diapers?!" Izzy snapped.

"Hey... were you listening...?"

"I mean, hey. A boat's waterproof," Dora excused.

"Only on the outside. It doesn't keep water it, stupid," Vicky argued. "Boats keep the water out."

"Er... excuse me, outsiders?"

Izzy piped up. "Actually, Vicky, there's no way to do a one-way waterproofing. In fact, most early sailors-"

The giant woman stomped her foot, long blonde locks flopping and tangling with the rigging. The sails and various ropes held back her enormous breasts. "Rghhhh! If you won't shut up, I'll drown out your obnoxious voices with cannon fire!"  She shifted herself to aim one side of her body at the party. Several cannons popped out of their holes and blasted towards them. The girls suddenly scattered as their catfightsonas launched themselves right back at the gunship.

The Wrestler swung her shoulders, smashing her tits into the cannon ball. It blasted apart with a resounding clang of a ring bell as it crumbled into debris. The Matron cracked her whip, entangling the remaining balls and pulling hard enough to make them crash into each other. "Sorry to bust your balls, darling! But it's a specialty of mine!" Matron gloated before lashing out again. Ama Mazu lunged a hand in her way, the long whip only able to grow big enough to wrap around a few fingers. Before she could drag her in, The Wrestler jumped up and landed on the middle of the whip before springing back off.

"Woo! Off the top rope!" Dora cheered from below as The Wrestler drop kicked the giantess in the face. Mazu's huge feet thundered across the rooftop before she steadied herself, rubbing her face.

"Why you little shits," she growled. "I've been settled in here for weeks and you barge in here ruining everything! I won't let you ruin a perfectly good nest!" Mazu grabbed for The Wrestler, but she grabbed a part of the rigging and swung like some kind of buff monkey out of its reach. She leaned harder into her grip, the ship creaking around Mazu's body. She stumbled but stayed standing, at least until The Godmother started pelting her with fire bullets from her gun. "OW! Watch the rigging!" she yelled, flailing around and trying to douse the sprouting flames. It threw her off enough that Wrestler could pull hard enough to shoulder toss the colossal woman in an impressive show of strength and leverage. They could see the hull crack and splinter as she landed hard on her side, and the flames started to split and tear up her sails until one giant breast popped out.

"Great! She's down! Everyone get her!" Dora shouted.

"Wait! No fair!" Ama Mazu objected. She was too busy trying to move her ship and get her hands free of the various ropes and sails to regain her balance or stop her attackers as every girl and their catfightsona dogpiled onto her. Vicky swung her pole to smack her across the leg that was poking out of the bottom of the massive ship, getting her to yowl and kick around. The Godmother floated over her while pelting her with more fire bullets, sparking little hazard fires across her deck.

"Go and be blessed, my child!" The Matron swapped back to her nun form and cast a quick spell over Izzy. When she pulled out her tazer, it glowed like a torch with a radiant light. Izzy smirked and scrambled up the ship to ram the tazer into her arm, making Mazu shake and jiggle from the lightning bolts pulsing out of it. The Wrestler had moved to pull up on the monstrous ship's hair in two big fistfuls while Dora climbed onto her chest and started to kick and stomp around her breasts as hard as she could. It left the bitchy battleship kicking and screaming as the girls ganged up on her.

"That's it! Don't let up! Now, Wrestler, charge up a-"

Then Dora woke up. She looked around and saw that she was in her bedroom with the posters of lady wrestlers and various sentai and superhero shows around. It was still dark out, but she saw a flash before a loud roll of thunder sounded outside. The storm must have been what startled her awake. "Oh crap," she muttered, quickly grabbing her phone.

"Uh... Dora?" Vicky looked over towards Mazu's head where Dora and Wrestler had vanished from sight. "Hey! Dora! Where did you-?" She was cut off by a grunt as one of Mazu's masts turned and slammed Vicky in the stomach with a pole. Izzy hurried off as it started to right itself, but Mazu lashed out with one giant hand to palm The Matron and crush her against the castle wall. When her hand recoiled, their healer was limply sliding down the wall with a weak groan.

"Not good," Izzy reported quickly. "We're down our tank! What happened?!"

"I don't know! She wouldn't shut up like usual then she disappeared! This had better not be some dumb plan of yours, Dora!" Vicky shouted at the sky. Mazu turned and launched a barrage of cannonballs, the Godmother blasting a handful of them out of the sky before another exploded when it hit her. She tumbled to the ground, wincing near her owner.

"There! I knew I could handle you pesky guardians!" Mazu boasted, ignoring the various bits of flaming wood that was crumbling around her nautical attire. "Now let's see if we can't finish off this pathetic mind and trap you in here forever!"

"Is that how that works?" Izzy asked in shock.

"I'm not positive!" Mazu boasted just as proudly as she raised her cannons towards the bubble that Stella was floating inside. There was a boom as they went flying towards the sphere, but they exploded before they could make contact. Everyone looked at them confused as another shape came floating down to crash onto the rooftop.

"Phew! That was a close one!" Kate The Gatekeeper smiled at the group, dragging her massive spiked club after her. The tall demon woman had a few fresh burns and scuffs on her suit, but she seemed unharmed and cheery as ever. "Dora sent me a text. Said you guys should get a status update." Kate held up her old flip phone with a text conversation going on in the screen. "She said lightning struck near her house and woke her up, so she's not sure when she'll be able to make it back."

"I mean... at least she's okay," Vicky said, glancing back at her team. Matron was starting to heal herself, but both of their catfightsonas were pretty banged up. "But that's our heavy hitter taken out of the game."

"Not... necessarily!" Izzy snapped her fingers as she stared at Kate. "Gatekeeper! Er... Kate, I guess... you're assigned to guard these realms! Can't you help us fight the Temptresses?"

"Who me?" Kate blinked in surprise, then laughed. "Of course not. I'm a simple gatekeeper. You guys are full fledged guardian agents."

Izzy fumbled around in her pouches until she produced her snapped-open badge halves. "Then... Kate Gatekeeper! As an active guardian official, I hereby deputize you into an honorary guardian yourself! Your duties begin immediately, so please administer yourself a badge for the most expedient assistance possible."

"Wait, did I miss something?" Mazu asked, stomping her massive feet as she turned around. "Who is this? Where's the loud girl?"

Kate wasn't listening as she stared wide-eyed at Izzy. She broke into a massive smile, then into tears. "I... I'm honored, miss! I promise you I will do my best to live up to your agency's expectations!" Kate snapped Izzy a salute and dug into her pocket, producing her own badge that looked as small as a silver dollar in large hand.

"Could we have done this the whole time?" Vicky muttered. Izzy elbowed her in the side. The monstrous warship raised her foot above them all, casting a long shadow across the roof.

"I'm done with waiting! I'm just finishing you before I get back to the ol' grind of busting up dreamscapes!"

As the foot came down, Kate spun around and swung her spiked iron club with the ease of a baseball bat. A massive CLANK could be heard as it hit Mazu's foot and sent it way off-center, tipping her to one side as she landed on the edge of the boat that would have been her hip. "Ow! I hit my aft, you bitch!"

Kate firmly planted the business end of her heavy club into the rooftop. "I don't care! I'm a rookie deputized guardian, and that means I will protect my comrades, this mind..." She picked up her badge and snapped it in half. "And I will protect my duties!"

There was the usual burst of colorful smoke as the badge split, but the party was surprised when it suddenly whisked away from her. The smoke dove down off the castle as if it was being pulled down by some intense force. A hand reached up from somewhere below with fingers the size of large men grabbing the edge of the rooftop. "Cruuuush," growled a voice as a woman with wild brown hair down to her hips stood up, easily three stories tall and rivaling the size of Ama Mazu herself. She wore a few weathered scraps of fabric that served as a leopard-print bikini, the best that seemed conceivable on The Giantess.

"Oh what the shit? Really?" Vicky said, gaping at the towering catfightsona.

"I mean... our 'sonas are bigger than we are, and she's even bigger than us," Izzy offered.

"Huh. I guess I never was terrible subtle," Kate mused to herself, rubbing her chin. "But I guess we better take care of this monster thing first, huh?"

With that, the giant cavewoman let out a snarl and charged across the rooftop on all fours. The wood beneath them shook as she tackled into the warship woman's side. Mazu shot off some wild cannon fire, but they flew harmlessly past her with The Giantess too close to aim.

"Get off of me, you... you brute!" Mazu snapped, too flustered to be facing something her own size for once. She beat her fists on The Giantess, but it barely flinched from her clumsier blows. Mazu finally got a punch to her jaw that made the catfightsona recoil from her grappling, but she just lunged back in and sank her teeth into one of the ship woman's breasts.

"Now THAT'S a tank," Vicky laughed as Kate reached over to gently urge her backward.

"Careful now. Don't want my senior agents getting hurt on my first day," Kate warned politely. Mazu was shrieking and flailing from the bite when The Giantess grabbed her by one of her masts and lifted her off the roof. Her legs kicked around uselessly beneath her boat parts as the primitive catfightsona swung her around and abruptly stopped. The human part of Ama Mazu went flying as the wood broke away, leaving her naked body spiraling through the air along with her fading scream. The Matron turned back into her dominatrix form, lashing out her whip to wrap around the warship woman's leg before she was out of reach. The Godmother raised her tommy gun and fired straight down the length of the whip, shooting Mazu up with barrage of lightning, ice and fireballs until the Temptress blew up in a massive explosion of red and yellow fireworks.

"Ha!" Vicky laughed as she watched the flickering and fading remains of the blown up villain. "We got 'er! Boat-ass bitch didn't have a chance."

"At least Dora's okay. Can we get her back in here?" Izzy asked, looking to Kate for answers. The Gatekeeper winced.

"Well... sort of. It's only advised to have three guardians in any sector at a time."

"Why is that?"

"Well, it gets a little heavy on the person's dreamscape. Three's tolerable, but when you get four or five voices going on in your head at once..."

"Point taken," Izzy noted.

vicky had walked up to where Stella was floating in her weird energy bubble. Its color seemed to be returning and its flickering had stopped. She shook her head and rapped her pipe lightly against its shell. "I could pop your ass right now if I wanted," Vicky scoffed. "Don't make me regret passing up that chance or I'll whoop you again in the real world."

The girls went back to reality and pooled their information. Izzy was able to dig up Stella's email and left her a message asking about her dreams, but she wouldn't get back to them until tomorrow afternoon. Dora was as fine as she'd promised and they agreed that while invaluable, it wouldn't be practical to call on The Giantess all the time. Luckily Kate was still a heavy hitter all on her own. They were sneaking texts back and forth during school the next day when History class was interrupted. A sharply-dressed, seven foot tall police woman entered the room, ducking under the doorway and addressing the class. Just like they'd planned over their texts.

"Yes! Hi! I'm Officer Kate, frommmmmm... ah, the next town over. Special Officer Kate! Anyway, I just wanted to report that there's been some suspicious activity lately. If you happen to recognize anyone behaving radically different or unusual changes in their nature, please don't hesitate to report to me!" She saluted the class and Dora grinned as she gave her a cheesy wink. She wasn't positive how kate got a police uniform, let alone one in her size, but she wasn't really sure how she had taken a human form either. Either way, this would hopefully make their hunt for more Temptresses that much easier.