Ghetto Goblin Girls (Patreon)

You had been living in the new apartment for a little while now. It was cozy, which was a nice way of saying “small.” With your new job, it's the closest and most affordable place you can get. The rent's pretty cheap, it covers your heating and electric bills, but the neighbors can be a bit much... 

"Krez, you cum-suckin' potbelly! Get your little jizz pup to shut up!"

"Why ain't sucking more humie dick, shitwaste!? At least then you shut your skank hole!"

There was a good reason that property near the goblin ghettos runs so cheap. It's not especially dangerous, but they can make a racket. The short, bright green creatures don't need a ton of space to live and will breed like crazy whenever they're able, so there's a number of buildings not a block away full of horny and mouthy goblins. You've got nothing against them myself; it's just how they behave, and with the apartment windows shut and the fan on, they're easy to ignore. And when you need a breeze, at least they have a… colorful language. All things considered, they’re obnoxious but pretty harmless… so long as you don’t mind some passing verbal abuse.

Every time you go to work, there’s this one particular goblin that hangs outside your apartment. You can’t tell if she’s an actual hooker or if she just waits there in her loud and trashy clothes. They always love bright clothing: some purple booty shorts, a beat up baseball cap, and a bright red jersey make up her standard affair. She leaves flat bare feet on the pavement tipped with darker green nails in contrast to her bright, lime-green skin. She’s big on accessories, never without some cheap piece of costume jewelry.  You’re generally far enough away from the others for them to ignore you, but goblins have a reputation for big and dirty mouths, especially when it came to humans.

“‘ey, spoon-ear!” she barks at you from across the street in her piping, shrill little voice with a hint of gravel to it. “Where ya goin’?! You starin’ at my shiiine?” She grinned and flicked the tip of her gold-painted chain, making it dance along the round breasts that would have no place on a human of her height. Shoulder-length neon green hair dangles around her cheeks, framing her narrow pink eyes.

“No, just… going to work,” you dismiss casually.

“Fuck that! Ain’tcha hungry for the green, biggums? I’ll treetcha real nice. Whatya say? Maybe I can come in your work and suck on some human sausage under ya desk!” She adds to her proposal by making a rapid jerking motion in the air with her fist. It’s too early for this and you hurry off to work. The last thing you need is to be late because of some random goblin on the street catcalling you.

Work’s easier than you thought; glorified number crunching and digital sorting. It passes the time quickly enough, but when you come back to your apartment, there’s the same goblin standing across the street. She’s taken up a perch sitting on your neighbor’s trash can, and she’s rapidly devouring a hot dog when she spots you. “Eyyyy! There’s my walking protein shake! How’s ya day? Betcha didn’t get some sloppy gobbo cunt at that work of yours. Whatcha say you come on over and put yer pot in my belly and we make us a bunch of backalley pups, huh?” 

You’d always thought the horniness and breeder instincts of goblins was an exaggeration made by crude coworkers and internet trolls. “I gotta go… eat,” you excuse lamely, and she cackles with amusement.

“You eat your greens yet today, you fuckin’ biggum? I got a lotta green right here!” She actually lifts up her top, a pair of bouncy green tits popping out as she giggles with glee. When you finally catch yourself staring at her melon-sized and melon-colored tits, you shake your head and go back inside your place as she whistles once more after you.

And it doesn’t let up. She’s there almost every time you leave your apartment, leaning on a wall or squatting territorially or on her cellphone, but she always stops to heckle you. She never asks for money threatens you, so it would feel weird to report her, so you put up with it.

“Lemee see what you’re packing in there, longpig! Don’t go actin’ like you’re not gonna get us in this! Mmmmmmhm, I see you starin’ at all this. You ready to go down down to goblin down, tall hung and pink?”

“Yo, spoon ear! I just heard they don’t check the bathrooms in the McGorgon’s up the road! How’s about I catch you on  your lunch break back there and I getcha a deep green quickie!? I’ll even name one of the little bastard fucks after ya! Whichever one’s the prettiest! Ain’t nobody gonna blame you for fuckin’ and leavin’ on a li’l green lapface, right?”

“Hey, papa! I just, JUST got this new phone! Lemme get your number so I can set this bitch on super-vibrate for when you call. I want that humie chunk so bad I’ma get off before you even touch me! You knowww that lemon-lime’s the sweetest flavor, don’tcha?”

“Hey, I got a question. How do humans even wear pants? I hear you got that crazy big dawg down there, and I am huuuung-a-ree!! Looky look! There’s not even anybody out this time-a day. I drop my panties, you snap some white up my ass, you tell your boss you got in traffic. Nobody’s hurt except my big green Incredible Donk!”

“Yeaaah, there’s my favorite visitor. What’s the weather like up there, because it is lookin’ HOT! You busy after work? Cuz my main green girl Vocky just invented this new fucktoy. It’s supposed to feel like one of them sloppy hung humie dicks, but I wanted to measure up. I knowwww you got the real deal, and I don’t know no toy that shoots you up with that baby potion! I wanna get hooked on ya fishin’ pole, big pinkie! You just come by that stinky green apartment and tell ‘em you’re askin’ for Tizz and they’ll tell you where to aim your dick at. Then you get ta paint this green bitch white!”

It was degrading, distracting, and humiliating. It also made walking to work with a boner incredibly uncomfortable. Eventually, you realize you’re not made of stone (or most of you anyway). You give in and go up to the apartment she pointed out to you, where you’re directed through the low-ceilinged halls by a portly male goblin.

Tizz is there to answer her door wearing nothing but a wifebeater, a couple rings and some ice blue panties. Even in her underwear she needs some bling. “Whoa, my meal on wheels! Getcha ass in here, ya fuckin’ too-tall.” She leads you inside, where the smell hits you. It’s like sweaty cave moss, and the whole apartment is only about as big as your  bedroom, all together, and that’s not counting the ceiling that makes you hunch your shoulders to stay under. “You good?” she offered, grinning and baring her thick teeth. “Need food? Water? Don’t fuckin’ ask about condoms, cuz we don’t catch your stupid humie diseases. That’s for wuss puss. All we get’s is halfin’s. Pinkie-gobbo babies.”

You tell her that you’re fine, though the place is a little low for you.

“Ahhhh, don’t you worry,” she says eagerly. “You won’t be standing up for long.” Tizz takes you back into her room, something like a roomy closet with an unkempt bed that’s a bit smaller than you are.”Welcome to the fuck-hut, stilts! Now get that humie chunk out and lemme see what you’re slappin’ in me.”

You start to take off your pants, Tizz watching you strip with an intent smile on her face. “You a virgin?” she asks suddenly when you get down to your boxers.

“What? No! I’ve been with girls before.” 

Tizz smirks as she sees your awkward frown. “Well you obviously never been with an easy green before. You gots them whatcha call… inhibitions still. Now come on.” Tizz claps her wide green paws together encouragingly. “Quit makin’ me wait. Whip out that one-pump gobbo stuffer.”

When you’re finally nude, you can see Tizz literally drool at the sight. “Daaaaaaymit, stilts. Wouldja look at the size of that jizz-slinger! I could chip a fang on that shit!” Even if you’re here for a booty call, you can’t help but blush at her shamelessly admiration of your human dick. She actually bounces on the bed with excitement, making her tits and ass wobble. “Come on! Come on! Stuff it in me, ya cloud-suckin’ cuckster! Get on over here and get to droppin’ baby bombs into your lil’ easy bake oven.”

Having enough of her weeks of egging you on, you grab her by the hair and  shove your cock into her mouth. She lets out a thrilled squeeze as your dick rams over her running mouth and button nose, and she slathers a short but thick tongue over your balls and shaft. “Mmm! Taste like cloud-sucker alright” she moaned, her big pink eyes going wide and hungry. “I can’t wait to fit this in my clover cunt.” She pulls your cock around like a joystick as she slurps all over it, wetting it from every angle with her thick and slimy spit. She keeps making these giggling noises, these shrill squeaks and snorts mixed in there that make her blowjob seem extra filthy.

“Ho shit, you really never been been gobbled by a gobber,” she grins, your precum and her drool running down her chin. She nips her fangs lightly at the skin of your dick, tugging it around by her teeth like a dog shaking around a toy. It splashes your seed over her cheeks, which by her sly grin was largely intentional. She squeezes your balls lightly between her nimble fingers before she takes up pumping your shaft, kissing and sucking firmly at the tip of your prick. “Fuck, I didn’t know humie tasted like this… I could suck on this goblin-choker of yours all night.”

“So you’re a virgin too?” you ask, and she doesn’t bother looking up from her work as she slaps you on the thigh.

“Hey, fuck you too, buddy! Here I am enjoyin’ a mouthful of this here flesh-hammer and you start shittin’ on my rep?” You hold your hands up in apology and she rolls her bulging eyes before going back to work on you. Her thin-lipped face wraps around your cock once more, beating you off and building you up more and more until she suddenly pops her mouth off. “Getcher phone out,” she orders. You look at her in surprise, which is apparently enough hesitation that she simply picks it out of your pocket. You swiftly stop caring what she’s planning as your balls tighten up and she starts snapping selfies while you spray your seed onto her face. She grins and laughs delightedly while flashing peace signs and duckfaces for the camera, clearly relishing your cum like a prize.

“Hahaaaa! Lookit that dumb look on your face!” she giggles despite the warm blobs of white dripping down her nose. She licks her lips to suck up anything around her mouth. “Gob damn, but you loved it! Bet you’re already thinking of denting in this potbelly with ya big pink spunk-stick. How’s it feel getting your dick dirtied by some chlorophyll cunt off the street, stilts?”

“Fucking amazing,” you sigh, leaning back on the bed. Tizz laughs gleefully as she steps out of her panties. There’s no pubic hair, but she has those plump thighs and a lean belly that form almost a perfect slope to aim at her greenish-orange swat.

“I just came,” you urge her. “Just give me a few…”

“Ohhhh, nuh uh! You let me taste the cream and ain’t gonna crush my clit? Fuck that!” She climbs up onto your lap, straddling one of your legs with her warm, slick slit as she grabs your cock. She starts pumping it violently until it stings, but the intense bouncing seems to wake your limping dick out from its retreat back into you. “Come on, ya jolly pink giant. I know you got more in you. You ain’t dickless. I’ve seen what you’re packin’ in that big ol’ chief-maker and I want another shot. This time, you’re stuff it in my little green bullseye, you hear me?”

As soon as you’re properly hard again, she slides her way forward and sticks you inside of her. She rides up and down, slowly at first as she clearly gets the hang of a human inside her. Her already bulging pink eyes widen as her thin-lipped mouth hangs open, making her look even more alien for a moment. Still, she’s the tightest fit you’ve ever had, to the point where you’re not sure where she’s putting it all or how she got it to fit. The only real clue you have is the bulge in her tight belly that slips up and down in time with your rod. 

“Oh damn oh damn, that’s gooood,” she purred, this strange little bubbling noise in the back of her throat. “That really hits the spot. I’ma want this gob-choker for breakfast, lunch and dinner like that! Looks like I’ma take my protein shake up the ass tonight!” You both start to hump more rapidly, more intensely as she rakes her painted nails over your chest. It feels like you miss a cue with that as she growls lowly. “Pull my ears,” she insists. When you don’t immediately listen she spits off the edge of the bed. “Yes, you, ya biggum fuckmeat! Gob, does it take your giant-ass brain that long to hear me?” You quickly do as she asks, which makes her sigh and arch her back. Her nipples quickly get hard, apparently some kind of erogenous zone. That raises some further questions as your thumbs brush past her earrings and she gives a quick, high squeak.

“Call me a swamp cunt,” she whispers after a couple minutes of this. She couldn’t be serious. Really?! That was basically the term you were never supposed to say in goblin company unless you wanted something tender bitten off of you. Goblins got called a lot of things, but for some reason that one never sat well with them (especially the males).

“I… I couldn’t,” you stutter out, your mind still on your dick.

“So those balls are all just for spunkin’ out humie milk, huh? Tallest fuck in the room is gonna make himself a potbelly with his chief-maker and fuck off without so much as pullin’ my hair?” She slaps you across the face. Goblins are quick, but they’re limbs are pretty scrawny, so it doesn’t hurt so much as it shocks you. “Call me a swamp cunt NOW!”

“You’re a dirty swamp cunt,” you mutter, but she demands it louder. “You’re a filthy fucking swamp cunt slut!”

“Ooooh, yea! That’s really got my babies boilin’! Keep going!” Suddenly it’s payback for all those days she spend dishing out dirty talk to you. You decide to go against every workplace assimilation training course you ever went to and drop every slur and insult you can remember hearing before. There are a lot, and she loves them all.

“You... backstabbing little greenback! I’m gonna break that little trash snatch of yours!” She laughs at that one for some reason, though it’s a gleeful laugh like she’s on an exciting ride (which happens to be your cock). For whatever the reason, she’s loving the verbal abuse. “I’m gonna fuck you and all your little lapface friends. I’m gonna turn your species extinct once they’re hooked on humie dick. I’m gonna suck and fuck that lime of a pussy until it turns inside out and I can taste your breeder cunt-brain. You were begging for that biggum dick and now you can’t even handle it! I’m gonna fill your little gutter gremlin twat with so much cum you’ll be able to knock up all your slimy little slum-mates. I’m gonna make you my little pocket-twat and plow you like the little cucumber farm you are! I can’t believe I’m low enough to fuck some horny street gobbo! I’m going to pump you full of biggum cum til you turn pink, you discolored cumdump. I’m going to make cum so deep in that potbelly that your eyes turn white! And then I’m going to shut that dick-licking, shit-talking mouth of yours so you’re finally shut... the fuck... up!”

You hear her scream in the middle of your last sentence, but you’re already in the throes of your last pumps. You overflow her with your wave of cum and she vibrates all around your rod as she has her own loud, high-pressured squirt beneath you. You end up barely holding yourself up from crushing her, but she pulls on your shoulders to force you into a kiss. Her stubby tongue is still bitter with the aftertaste of your cum and some cheap Wendys fries.

“You fuck good for a virgin,” she teased when you finally pull yourself from the kiss.

“And for a human?”

“All humans fuck good. Everybody knows that,” Tizz snorts dismissively. “Oh, and fucking send me those selfies. I’ma use those for later…”

You and Tizz part ways, and you wave back the next time she catcalls. It’s a little disappointing when she’s not there the day after that, deciding she must have something better to do. Maybe she’s locked herself up while she’s pregnant. You figure you can check up on her later, remembering where her room number was. When you get to the office, they explain you’ll be handling some new duties from now on. They’ve started an outreach program: government writeoffs and all those extra angles. You’ll be showing the new girl the ropes, some underprivileged but hard-working sort by the way your coworkers talk. Your boss leads you over and gestures to Tizz sitting in the waiting room, popping gum while wearing her baseball cap, beat up jean shorts, and cleavage-bearing mockup of a jersey. She grins as she sets her eyes on you. “Heyyyyy! Fuckin’ spoon-ear!”