Anomaly Acquisitions: The Case Files - Andoni (Patreon)

Name: Andoni

Anomaly Designation: Merman

Anomalous Properties: Humanoid shape with aquatic traits. Gills, two pairs of specialized lungs (one for air and one for water), webbed fingers and toes to aid in swimming. Prehensile tongue (unsure of origin or if naturally occurring. Needs further study). Like ancient myths of "sirens", has some sort of sonic projection that pacifies and attracts people within audible range. [Note: Reports from [Redacted] that this can perhaps penetrate small walls and is quote "quite annoying". Edit: Please refrain from leaving unofficial notes in official documentation.]

AA Status: Head of Chamber, Anomaly Council

Interview:

-Interviewer: Could you please state your name for the record.

-Andoni: Andoni.

-Interviewer: Do you have a last name? Or any other names/designations?

-Andoni: Not in a way that you would understand.

-Interviewer: We can translate afterwards. Just say it for the camera please.

-Andoni: That's not a good idea, friend.

-Interviewer: Try me.

-[Silence]

-[Static]

-Post-action reports show significant spike in audio waves below 10 Hz. Interviewer rendered unconscious. First aid rendered by subject before med team enters-

Interview 2:

-Interviewer 2: Could you please state your name for the record.

-Andoni: Andoni.

-Interviewer 2: We've already got your "other" name on record, thank you.

-Andoni: No problem.

-Interviewer 2: You're the current Head of Chamber for the Anomaly Council, correct?

-Andoni: Correct.

-Interviewer 2: How did you come by that position? As an anomaly it's expected you'd be a sitting member, but it was originally planned that Head of Chamber be a ranked official of AA proper.

-Andoni: Is that not official history?

-Interviewer 2: As I'm sure you know, since the attack on AA at large, there is lots of documentation missing, as many of our servers have been destroyed or corrupted. Please if you would help us fill in the details.

-Andoni: Right. Well, I was as surprised as anyone that I'd be put in that position. It wasn't ever really my place to be at the head of anything. Except maybe my lovely Beacon.

-[Silence]

-Andoni: I was told through the vine of grapes as you people say, that Blue had a big push for each of us that was at the Beacon's side throughout the events of the last year to be assigned official duties. On this side of the grapes, we have some theories about why they would be trying to split us up.

-Interviewer 2: Any theories you'd like to share?

-Andoni: Will Blue be able to see this?

-Interviewer 2: Yes. The Director of field teams has access to all Anomaly logs.

-Andoni: Mmm... I am suddenly devoid of theories.

-Interviewer 2: What can you tell us about your experiences with subject Beacon? You were quite close with them, correct?

-Andoni: The closest. Don't listen to what anyone else says. Especially anyone shorter than me.

-Interviewer 2: Right... And your experiences with the Beacon?

-Andoni: They're one of the sweetest, most loyal, most gentle, most firm, most sexiest people I've ever met, and I've swam throughout the entire ocean.

-Interviewer 2: And they-

-Andoni: -the most attentive too. They really do listen when you talk to them. It's so reassuring when you know you're being heard.

-Interviewer 2: And-

-Andoni: -and they also have a really nice ass.

-Interviewer 2: Okay. Thank you for your time, Andoni.

-Andoni: -and they also-

Interview End