Never Fade Away: It Was A Passion For The Ages (ch. 22) (Patreon)

"The outside world smells," M decided, looking around at Night City with a sense of wonder. Wonder that I had felt once, but now I was looking into every single shadow for an enemy. We were on our way back to the base in Pacifica -- everything had went as smoothly as it could have, even if the loss of A was a bitter pill to swallow. We had his body and he would get a burial. The first one among us, I figured.

"You get used to it," I told him. "Up until a few days ago, the ceiling was covered in these things called clouds that would rain acid over the city like a shower," I told him and M clearly thought that I was messing with him. His gaze flickered to Jack, who nodded and his eyebrows climbed high. "The outside world is a really strange place. Really strange. The giant lightbulb is real -- it's called the sun. And we know what Arasaka and Militech are now. They're these things called companies that a bunch of people work for this stuff called money. They work for a number of hours for a stated rate, and then they use that money to buy things."

I could see that M couldn't picture it. It was too alien for him. He had absolutely no frame of reference, just like I didn't at the very start. It would be a bold faced lie to say that I knew everything about the world now, but even the little that I did know was still miles ahead of where M was now. It was thanks to David and Becca that I knew anything at all. Jack quickly picked up where I left off. "There's also these things called clubs where you can dance and drink and get high. All to have fun," she added.

"Fun?" M echoed, sounding absolutely lost. Overwhelmed, really. I shared a look with Jack. I had David and Becca to teach me. Jack, on the other hand, took to the outside world like she had been here all her life. "Like tests and stuff?"

"Way better- oh, what about music? L, turn the radio on," she instructed, and my eyes flashed blue for a second and I selected a channel. A second later, DJ Elephant's voice filtered through the speakers.

"- close your eyes, or keep them wide open -- ain't no denying the truth. Today has been a wild, wild, wild ride. The Tyger Claws are gone. G. O. N. E, people. Dust in the wind. Oh, I'm sure that they're a couple cats still going to call themselves that, but what the Tyger Claws were ain't coming back." DJ Evansstated in no uncertain terms. "L called them out to Rocky Ridge to bury the hatchet and the bodies, and I will tell you this dear listeners -- a lot of bodies got buried there. It was a god damn massacre like I haven't seen since the last corpo war, and word is that Arasaka swooped in to keep things cool and L took a swing at them too."

I started to change the channel, but Jack punched me in the shoulder, as if sensing that I had the thought. "Don't, I want to listen."

"It's embarrassing," I complained, but Jack didn't seem to care. The radio had M's full attention too, so I was out voted.

"Today was a day that's going down in the history books for Night City. It's up there with old Silverhand nuking Arasaka Tower back in the day. The Tyger Claws were as much a part of Night City as the concrete and steel that built this place -- part of the foundation. And it's gotten ripped right up, folk. Japantown and Kabuki, even little China have always belonged to the Tyger Claws. They were the biggest gang in the whole city. And they're gone, people. All because they pissed off the wrong guy. I'll be honest -- when he gave my radio show a call, I thought I'd be talking about how a Merc went down swinging against the gang. Never in my life could I have expected what would actually go down there."

M looked at me, "They're talking about you?" He seemed to realize, and I shrugged.

"Night City is the city of dreams, baby. A city of Legends. Blackhand, Silverhand, Bartmoss, and Arasaka's own Adam Smasher -- every one of them that rocked the world in their own way can trace their roots back to these streets. And, I have to tell you, after tonight, I think we have another name to go on that short list -- L. A living legend." DJ Evans said, and Jack punched me on the shoulder. I felt a fluttering in my chest while I met M's gaze as our truck entered Pacifica.

Z had wanted to be remembered.

"I don't know what's going to happen next. I wish I did, but I genuinely have no idea -- and that ain't something I'd admit to usually. But, I do know this -- the streets are hotter than they have ever been before. If you aren't a banger looking to take a corner, then stay off the streets. I mean that, now. Last thing I want is some of my precious viewers catching some flack because their style got mistaken as the flag for a new gang that's trying to take the Tyger Claw throne." He continued, "And L, if you're listening… you made it, kid. Welcome to the big leagues."

With that, I turned the radio off, half out of embarrassment and half because we were pulling up to my base. The bulkhead doors slid open for me, revealing the parking garage I had set up shop in. I had done my best to prepare for reprisals. My security system was thorough and deadly -- explosive charges, mines, and dozens upon dozens of security turrets. The bulkhead doors were thick, but I knew it wouldn't stop a dedicated force. It was just to slow them down and bleed them so I could prepare our escape..

Coming to a stop after the final bulkhead door closed behind us, I let out a sigh of relief when I saw the others. David was seated on a car with Lucy next to him, Becca was standing on her arms with a deep frown on her face and she seemed to be listening to something that Falco was saying. They glanced our way as we got out, all of them perking up when they saw M, who looked at them cautiously, glancing at me for reassurance.

I noticed that we were missing someone, "Where's Kiwi?" I asked, and I saw that's what they were all frowning about.

"She left," Falco explained, earning a blink from me. "We snagged the meds, but after we did, she dipped out. Didn't come back with me, and she's not answering any of my calls."

My brow furrowed, "Is she in trouble?" I asked, my eyes flashing blue. I had a thumb in everyone's systems because of the mission- I blinked when I realized that the positive I had from Kiwi was a false one. That… that's not something you could do on a whim, I decided. To subvert my code like that, it would have to be a premeditated, deliberate decision. Or something that was done to her? But if that was the case, then I would have known she was in danger…

"That old bag is a cautious one, L. I think she might have split because of the heat we just got. We did rob Arasaka and Militech blind," Becca pointed out, making my frown deepen. Then she flashed a smile at M, who was looking at everyone with curiosity and caution. "I'm Becca! We helped you bust out of the Orphanage!"

M blinked, glancing at me, and I forced my frown off of my face. Kiwi had left us? Why didn't she say anything? She never said a word during any of the planning -- did she have doubts? Was she worried? Why did she run? "It's true. I wouldn't have made it without them," I admitted, shoving my concerns about Kiwi to the side for the moment. It was partly because I didn't know what I was feeling at the moment. I've never had someone just… leave me like this. Whenever someone left my life, it was because they were dead.

David sent me a soft smile, "I think you would have gotten by just fine without us." His gaze flickered to M, "I'm David. This is Lucy, and Falco." He introduced the rest of the group, making M narrow his eyes.

"... Why do your names have so many letters?" He asked and I scratched at my cheek, thinking of my own name.

"It's normal out here," I told him. "The Orphanage took our names. I'm John Shepard," I told him, the name still sounding foreign on my tongue. It felt like the name belonged to someone else. "And your name is Kaiden. Kaiden Alenko," I told him, making him blink in surprise.

"Kaiden?" He seemed to taste the word in his mouth, his gaze sliding to Jack.

"L's the only one that still uses a letter as his name," Jack told him. To that, I shrugged. I couldn't put it into words. The feelings weren't the kind I could articulate. John Shepard might be the name I had been given at birth, but that wasn't who I was. I was L. Maybe, one day, I could become John Shepard… but until the work was done, I would be L. I would be what the Orphanage made me and what I had to become to escape it.

"I like it," Kaiden decided, accepting the name. "I suppose we should start introductions for the others?" He asked me, and I nodded. This was the moment of truth. The moment I had been preparing for. The moment that I anticipated.

David patted on the shoulder, seeing my hesitation. He offered a small nod, and I felt the concern that gripped my heart ease up. Right. The hard part was already done, I had to remind myself as I reached down to my belt and took out the secure container. David presented me with the one from the girls home and I went about setting them up. The others watched on in silence, but when everything was in place, Lucy sent me a message.

'They won't blame you,' Lucy told me, knowing exactly what I was worried about. A concern that had lurked in the back of my mind ever since I got out and learned about the Wayward Home for Girls.

If I had been rescued from the Orphanage… I would have been angry. 'Why now?' That was the question that I dreaded. 'Why didn't you come days ago? Weeks ago? Months ago? If you did, then this person could have been saved.'

I knew that, and I still made the decision to wait until I was ready to provide for them. At least until they could provide for themselves. However, I knew that answer wouldn't soothe the pain. If someone had rescued me just after Z died? Or R? I would have been furious.

Lucy was probably the only other person  that could really understand that. So, I took a deep breath and let it out before activating the storage. The small disks expanded, and one by one, the children that had been sealed inside of it grew back to their true height. I shouldn't have been surprised, but T-7 was one of the first to leave, running towards me and lunging in for a hug.

"Hey, T," I told him effortlessly picking him up and he threw his arms around my neck. He caught the eye of the others, and he immediately went still.

"You look weird," He told Becca in no uncertain terms.

"And you're a lot less cuter than you were a second ago," Becca returned while Jack laughed. "You're lucky that you're chooms with L, or I would have squished ya'." T looked absolutely affronted, but it was a better reaction than I was expecting. I was anticipating fear. Uncertainty. I knew it would be a lot to take in, and while I did think he was hiding how uncertain he really was based on how tightly he was clinging onto my side, he was still doing better than I expected.

This brief distraction was a welcome one because the others were rapidly leaving the containers. There didn't seem to be any adverse side effects to using the PYM particles on biological tissue, thankfully. I'd feel absolutely awful if someone was turned to goop after being rescued. I saw a number of familiar faces in the crowd that was rapidly forming, but I saw more faces that I didn't. It was downright easy to see who knew who. The boys and the girls were eying each other with confusion and uncertainty -- for some of them, I'm sure this was the first time they ever saw someone of the opposite gender that was their age.

It was easy to tell the only reason that things hadn't dissolved into pure chaos was the fact that Jack was standing next to me. I saw a number of girls watching her warily. Fearfully, even. But, things remained peaceful, if extremely tense as the last of the children trickled out of the platforms that closed down the moment they were empty. I felt David give me a light shove forward, ushering me to take the lead.

Swallowing a lump in my throat, I stepped onto the car to overlook everyone, and I saw nearly two thousand pairs of eyes turn to face me. If we had managed to get everyone out, then I honestly doubt I would have been able to fit them. "I'm L-16. Until a few months ago, I was trapped in the Home for Wayward Boys -- guys, that's where all of you were. And girls, you were trapped in the Home for Wayward Girls. But, through planning, sacrifice, and a little bit of dumb luck… I was able to get out." I began, and you could hear a pin drop it was so silent in my home.

Our home.

It was actually a little unnerving, especially with so many people looking at me. "It took me months of planning and a lot of work, but with the help of these people, I was able to get you all out too. You're free. There won't be any more experimentation. There won't be any more quizzes or challenges for you to complete. You won't have to go into every work day wondering if you're going to die… or worse, worrying that when you wake up, you'll wake up alone." I could see the words were resonating with them. But, above all else, I saw the doubt.

"I know it's a lot to take in. It's a lot to believe. And, if you don't believe another word that I say, then believe this -- the world is so much bigger than the rooms that we grew up in. It can be dangerous and frightening, but I promise you that it is so much better than everything we ever knew in the Orphanages." I had no idea what I was doing with this speech, but there really was no way to prepare them for the outside world. Not in any meaningful way. It was something so vastly… more than any of us could have ever imagined in those rooms.

I didn't know how to tell them about the world. I didn't even know how to make them understand what was taken from them. That ignorance was a blessing in the Orphanage, but out in the world, when you saw what was robbed from us… they took our childhoods. They took our names. And they took the lives of our friends and family.

I licked my lips, realizing that I was hesitating. "I've managed to secure the building. It has windows that we can look out of to get all of you used to seeing open spaces. Because the room outside is bigger than anything you can possibly imagine. You'll have to take some medicine too, because our immune system is too weak since we grew up in a sterile environment. I'll take the doses with you," I continued, seeing some faces scrunch up. I understood. I didn't like taking my meds either.

Slowly, cautiously, I saw a hand raise up. I didn't know them, but they were a boy. Meaning that it was someone that Kaiden rescued. "You don't need to raise your hand here. You can just ask," I told him, trying to show him that this place was different that the orphanage.

"Does this mean we can go outside? I… I want to see a car!" He exclaimed, having absolutely no idea that I was standing on one. To that question, I should say no. The list of reasons were very long. Extremely long. Chief among them was the fact that Arasaka and Militech would not let this slide. No matter what, they would be coming for us. Sending two thousand ignorant boys and girls into the city was asking to get caught.

If I hadn't lucked out and met David and Lucy then I had no doubts in my mind that I would have wound up right back in the Orphanage. If I was lucky.

I hesitated to answer, "In small groups. And only after you've taken your meds. You'll get extremely sick if you don't," I decided. I could oversee some small groups. Get them acclimated to the city, and those kids could then help other groups. As part of our work schedule, all of us had military training. Even the youngest of us. I had the equipment to make sure that they could protect themselves in the city. And if they ever needed help, then I was just a call away.

"Like you?" Another voice called out, gesturing underneath her nose and I touched it to see that my nose was bleeding again. I checked my meditech to see that everything was elevated, but nothing critically so.

I pinched off my nose and offered a smile, "I'm pretty bad at remembering to take my medicine," I admitted. That got a few smiles from everyone, the tension in the room slowly easing out. "It's a lot. I know. You're going to have more questions than you can count and it's all going to be overwhelming. I've been there. I know what it's like. So, I want you to know that you can ask me anything. I'll do everything that I can to help you. I promise. But… for now… why don't we all get to know one another? We're a giant family now." I offered, and the groups of children slowly turned their attention to one another.

It wouldn't be simple.

It wouldn't be easy.

But, as I saw the first of the children begin to introduce themselves, basking in their newfound freedoms…

I knew it was worth doing all the same.