A very p*rny Xenomorph (Patreon)

Hey all,

So I spent a little bit more time on this one than the others to make it look nice. And not just because it's symmetrical so I had to keep track of that, but also because I wanted to make her look nice and glossy.

I wanted to do this because this isn't just any Humanoid Alien, not even any Alien as a whole. It's because the Xenomorph is my favourite Alien and movie  monster period, from two of my all-time favourite films (Alien and Aliens of course), in ALL of pop-culture.

The sequels and spin-offs range from "eh" to "utter shit". And because I can't resist I'm going to rate all of the movies now:

Alien: Excellent, masterclass in horror movie making, doesn't get any better than this.

Aliens: Excellent, in an entirely different way. Cameron in his prime really knew how to do action.

Alien3:  Eh, tries to go back to the horror roots but can't measure up to the  original (because how can you top perfection?) Also the writer being  lazy at the beginning and pressing the delete button on some surviving characters instead of dealing with them in his story really brings it down. I'm not the biggest fan of Newt and Hicks, but you can't call that  good writing no matter which way you slice it. (if it wasn't for that, Alien3 would probably just be "good")

Alien resurrection: Utter shit, a stupid mess, Alien 3 completed Ripley's arc and killed her, and again writers were lazy and just resurrected her. Then it completely misses the point of the Xenomorph (gore and slimy-ness is not what made it scary, you're just being gross movie)

Prometheus: Eh, REALLY pretty to look at, visual effects at their peak. Stupid story, every  character has a crippling case of the dumb in order to make the plot happen, also the "because it's what I choose to believe" angle was dumb and shallow.

Alien Covenant: Eh, maybe it should belong in the utter shit rating because it doesn't have the beautiful visuals to back it up (though it's still rather pretty in places). But it's basically  just as dumb as Prometheus, if not dumber. But at least it's a proper entry in the series instead of the teasing "maybe it is, maybe it isn't" nonsense we had in Prometheus' marketing.

Alien vs Predator: Eh, dumb but fun. Good to turn your brain off and throw popcorn against your face to.

Alien  vs Predator requiem: Utter shit, like the first AvP but less fun, also I can't make out what's going on most of the time because it's too dark, I don't like squinting through my movies trying to make out shapes. Also, again, shock and gore isn't scary, it's just gross, was that maternity ward scene really necessary? I think we all got the picture the first time movie.

At least none of them are quite as offensively bad as 'The Predator' was. I'm so, so sorry Predator franchise, you deserve better.

So being a Xenomorph she both was and wasn't easy to lewd. Easy because Xenomorphs were designed to be creepily sensual and sexual, being based of of H.R. Giger's strange Biomechanical hellscapes with penises and vaginas appearing all over the place, and hard because the Xenomorphs are based on the creepy and disturbing hellscapes H.R. Giger is famous  for.

I hope I managed to really bring the sensual and sexual part to the fore while pushing the disturbing and creepy back a bit.

And this also introduces us to another category! The biomechanical.

Or maybe it's a sub-category of monster girl, which itself is a  sub-category of the humanoid Alien. Making it another sub-category of a sub-category of a category.

These categories are getting confusing.

SoCarter out.