Finding Balance: My Journey Towards a Healthier Work-Life Dynamic (Patreon)

Hello everyone, I’m sorry I haven’t been able to film the past few days.

While I mentioned previously that my goal was to film 4-6 videos a day, I just simply can’t at the moment. Part of it is physical, and part of it is mental.

I’ve created a schedule for myself, and I’ll be filming every other day. Filming on Mon/Wed/Fridays, doing administrative work and scheduling, and focusing more on my physical and mental health on Tues/Thurs, and taking days off on the weekends to breathe.

Please don’t view my failure to film the past few days as anything other than trying and failing. After Blaire left in February, I haven’t really breathed and have been cleaning up my life bit by bit. I hope the undertaking of fixing the backlog can demonstrate that I truly mean it when I say I’m trying to get back into fighting shape—but it’s a long process.

My baseline mental health is fantastic, but still, integrating my filming schedule back into my life is going to be a learning process as I figure out how to properly balance. And still, I stress and beat myself up when I don’t film and I beat myself up a lot yesterday, but I’m trying to be compassionate to myself and not shame spiral.

I’ll be keeping my Patreon content free for April, and I won’t promise a numerical value of how many videos I’m going to film, I can only keep to my schedule and just work my way back up, video by video.

This may be disappointing to some, people want a “set” value of how many videos I’ll film, and what’s going to come out, but I am just not there yet.

I’m giving this warning in advance, this is a process of trial and error, so feel free to pause your patronage or even leave, while I figure this out. People want consistency but I am in a mourning period, and a self-fixing period—I cannot guarantee consistency until I am better.

I would greatly appreciate anyone who can support me through this effort. I have bills to pay and this is my livelihood, so your support is crucial but it’s a choice on your part—please keep that in mind.

March was the month of fixing my backlog, April will now be the month of fixing my work boundaries. My instinct is to try and dive in head first, but I’m working everyday to not do that.

I can only promise that I’m getting better day by day, but this is years of neglect I’m recuperating, it’s unfortunately not going to get better overnight.

Many Patrons have expressed that I should also just “take a break” and while that is an option, it won’t fix my root cause—which is balancing my work life and my personal needs. Taking a break is not an option, until I have a healthy work life balance. I’m taking this very seriously, and my mental fortitude is trying to get this right by treating myself and my work like an athlete.

So I’m letting you know, starting next week my filming days will be Mon/Wed/Fri and my releases will be Tues/Thurs/Sat.

I can only hope that my actions inspire others to prioritize their well being, but also to better and course correct aspects of their lives—even if it’s difficult.

Thank you for your patience, let’s start this new month off right.