Monthly Bonus Content #2—'Not the Biggest Fan of Quaint, Babe...' (Farah Valentine's Special) (Patreon)

(Really got carried away with this one....like nearly 2000 words of carried away...so apologies for the length, hehe! :D)

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Farah cocks her head to one side with a purse of her lips and a sigh. “Does this town do anything but quaint?”

“The Square is kind of classy,” I counter with a shrug.

“Sure,” she states. “But we’re not staying somewhere in The Square. We’re staying…in this.” She waves a hand out towards the wood-fronted cottage, a wraparound porch matching the perfect shade of magnolia that seeps across the whole two-storey house. Acer trees drip fire-red leaves across the front lawn, a few falling loose and skittering across the top of a pond, disturbing the serene inky pool which flashes with occasional goldfish.

I nod but let out a sigh. “It’s picture book.”

She turns to me with a withered stare. “It’s quaint, and I’m really not the biggest fan of quaint, babe.”

“Well, unfortunately, it’s not like we got to choose the location,” I remind her, dragging two suitcases behind me as Farah strides on ahead.

“Yeah, I know,” she groans. “But why Redland wanted to stay here of all places is a bit…weird.” She glances over her shoulder to me, notices my struggles, and scurries back to take one of the cases. “He doesn’t exactly seem like a quaint kind of person either.”

“That’s true.” Anxiety has already been gnawing a hole in my gut, but Farah’s on-point observation makes it bite just that touch deeper.

I try to shake it off as we approach the front door. A heart-shaped wreath made of twigs and ribbons hangs against the wooden panels.

Farah rolls her head towards me with a look that screams, ‘Oh look. How quaint.’

I swallow back a chuckle as the door swings open to reveal a surprisingly elegant man dressed in a tweed coat and cream cotton trousers. He smiles brightly, the expression looking a well-practiced one and adding a shine to his eyes.

“Greetings!” he calls, buffeting us with the enthusiastic welcome. “You must be the Hauvilles.”

Now it’s my turn to glance at Farah with an arched brow that asks, ‘Really?’

Farah shrugs before returning the man’s expression with an even brighter grin, curling her arms around my middle and pressing up against my side.

“That’s us. The Hauvilles.  Just a pair of happy newlyweds,” she explains with a waggle of her brows.

“Oho, how wonderful!” The man claps his hands together. “Do come in. I have the honeymoon suite all prepared.”

We follow the man upstairs, battered by the unyielding aroma of rose and honey that sinks into the air from a wide selection of dishes carrying piles of potpourri.

Our host draws to a stop and spreads an arm out to the door beside him.

The honeymoon ‘suite’ seems to be as cramped as any other room in the establishment, but we’re polite enough not to say as much as we squish inside the bedroom at the man’s excited insistence.

“If you need anything—anything at all֫—then please don’t hesitate to let me know,” he says, lingering for a moment in the doorway while shifting from foot to foot. “And if you do get the chance, be so kind as to leave a review on the travel site you found us at. We are a new B&B and need all the help we can get!” The door clicks shut as he leaves.

“Oh,” I let out as realization kicks in. “That’s why Redland’s staying here.”

Farah lifts her head up from where she’s already sprawled herself out over the large bed. “Hm?”

“This place is new. The owner likely won’t recognize him from when he used to live here.” It’s only a theory, but it seems a solid one.

Farah pushes herself a little further up to rest on her elbows. “Guess it’s why he didn’t recognize you either. We can barely take a walk around town without someone stopping you to say hello.”

“You’re one to talk,” I retort. “Every time we go somewhere to talk to supernaturals, they go all goo-goo over you all when they know you’re Unit Bravo.”

She flops her head back onto the pillow with a sigh while pressing a hand to her chest. “The ordeals of fame.”

“At least we should both be able to enjoy the peace without that while we’re here.” I chuckle through the words, though the thought almost escapes me as I head to the window and stare out at the grounds.

The B&B is nestled in the forest, not too far from the town. A winding, fresh tarmac trail leads down a steep hill towards the spread of buildings below, though most are hidden behind the trees which jut up from the rocky hillside.

My thoughts really do escape me as Farah’s arms wrap around me from behind, and her lips press gently against the pulse in my neck.

“I love that that still happens,” she whispers against my skin.

“What?” I ask, turning in her arms and curling my own around her in return, our mission very quickly forgotten.

She leans into me with a smile that captures my entire focus. “Your pulse still spikes when I kiss you.”

I laugh, resting my hand against her neck before leaning forward and capturing her lips with my own. Her pulse kicks against my fingers, and I smile against her mouth before drawing back.

A sigh of disappointment leaves her as I pull away.

“I’m happy to see yours does the same,” I comment.

“Babe, that’s never going to change. You just have to look at me, and I think might swoon onto the floor,” she admits with only honesty flowing through those words.

I’ve never met anyone so open about how they feel before. And I’ve certainly never been with anyone so open.

No games. No secrets. No worries.

Just…her.

And she is perfect.

I press myself against her and hug her close, both of us allowing ourselves to fall into another kiss that does more than just make my pulse race. Each kiss makes me feel that much more alive. My skin tingles, my body ignites, and my stomach flutters with so many butterflies that they make flight right into my chest.

We draw back, mostly so as I can catch my breath.

She pecks another kiss against my lips. “So, what is it we’re actually supposed to be doing here?”

“You mean, you didn’t listen intently to Adam’s very long, very detailed briefing of the plan?” No joke. There was a handout. It was over fifty pages.

Her hands slip away as she throws herself back onto the bed to retake her sprawled position from before. “I kind of tuned out after the first five minutes.”

I sigh and bend down, starting to sort out the equipment we’d brought with us hidden in our suitcases. “We’re here undercover.”

“I got that part.”

“We’re just another couple—”

“Newlyweds,” she corrects. My body fizzes with a pulse of excitement as she says the words.

“We’re newlyweds who happen to be staying at the same B&B as Redland Topher.” I twist to look at her. “You caught the part about him, right?”

“Bad guy. Used to work for The Agency. Takes supernatural and magical goods to use them in his own human-world products and make billions,” she reels off.

My brows shoot up. “That’s pretty much it, yeah. I wish Adam could cut things down to the essentials like that.” I bend down to return to my task, digging out a small laptop as well as some notebooks for recording Redland’s movements. “We’re here to keep an eye on him. Maybe see if we can’t overhear any conversations or take a peek around his room if he carelessly leaves it open.”

“Carelessly leaves it open?” Farah asks.

“We break in when he’s not there,” I clarify.

She throws me a finger gun and a wink. “Gotcha.” But her whole body suddenly stiffens after the gesture. Her focus snaps to the door. “Don’t think we’ll be catching him while he’s out.” She jerks her head at the doorway. “Someone’s walking down the hallway on the phone. And considering the conversation, I don’t think it’s this place’s normal ‘quaint’ kind of patron.”

I spring back onto my feet and rush for the door. With care, I carefully twist open the handle and peer out of the small crack, trying to get a glimpse of our target.

But I get a real close-up view as Farah comes right up behind me and balances against me to see out, sending us both toppling out into the hallway, almost colliding with the man himself.

Redland Topher is just as imposing as his reputation. His square frame is clothed in an expensive, tailored black suit, the cloth tense over hard muscles as he stares down at us with a confused frown. His pale skin looks almost porcelain with a sweep of black hair pulled back from his angular face, touches of grey almost softening the look if not for the harsh cut of his lips as his confusion twists to annoyance.

“You’re in my way,” he states, hovering his phone near his ear.

Farah and I glance at each other before fumbling to stand up straight, where we both fall into our roles in precise sync. She hugs up close against me, and I wrap my arms around her waist in return, trying to force a smile onto my expression.

“Sorry,” Farah mutters, adding a chuckle onto the words. “We didn’t realise the doors in this place weren’t going to be very sturdy.” She nuzzles into my neck, and I almost forget that this is a pretense as my body warms to the intimate touch.

Redland’s sharp eyes cast a glance at our door. The words ‘Honeymoon Suite’ are haloed by painted vines and heart-shaped flowers. His demeanor softens so fast, I wonder if I imagined the glare from before.

He laughs. It’s a sound drowning with charisma.

“No worries, my friends. Enjoy your time together. It’s the most precious thing you’ll ever own.” He winks, letting peal another chuckle before striding past us.

Farah lifts her head from my neck, and the steamy fog from my mind lifts. We balance against each other as we try to angle closer to the steadily retreating Redland.

“Warehouse…if not…all right.” It’s the only mumbled words I catch before he snaps the door to his room shut behind him.

Farah and I head back inside our own space.

“Did you catch anything?” I ask.

“He’s making plans to visit a warehouse. The woman on the other end said, ‘Gladbrick Real Estate will find just what you need if this isn’t to your liking’.” She effects a soft voice for effect.

My brows lift. “Gladbrick? That’s in the Big City. What are they doing selling warehouses out here?”

She shrugs, climbing onto the bed to sit down against the pillows. “We did our part. Leave the investigation stuff to the others.” Her body sinks into the soft mattress as she pats the patchwork duvet. “Now all we have to do is enjoy the rest of our time here.”

“And how do you suggest we do that?” I ask, as I crawl up the bed towards her, enjoying the way her eyes alight as I near. “A bit of cross-stitch, perhaps? Or I think I saw a ‘How to Knit’ book in the cabinet downstairs—” My breath leaves me in a rush as she springs forward and rolls us over.

She smiles down at me, running her fingertip across my bottom lip before trailing it down to rest her hand against my fluttering pulse. “Nothing quite so quaint, babe.”