Candy Crush Cunnilingus (Patreon)

The sound of rain tapping against the tall glass windows of Alex’s apartment made for the perfect white noise as she sat and stared over the gloomy city that she lived in. She never really noticed it before, but the city looked a little dystopian whenever it rained. The sky was grey, the smog in the sky came closer to the ground, and people stayed inside, which meant the streets were mostly empty as if the entire population of the city had just up and vanished. She enjoyed people-watching a lot when it rained, even if she was up on a considerably high floor in her building and could only see the people as tiny ants and cars as Hot Wheels. With her phone in her hands and her arms looped over her knees, the tigress continued to stare out the window, watching a yellow Volkswagen Beetle as it zoomed through the mostly empty streets and splashed water all over the sidewalk. She watched it for a good minute before it turned down a street where she couldn’t see it anymore. She let out a sigh and looked out the window for a couple more seconds before she pulled her phone up to her face.

She had her group chat with her friends Charlie, a mouse, and Lauré, a red panda in it, open. The group text was fittingly called “Stripes and Squeaks 🥩🧀🎍” and they had been planning a picnic in the park for what was probably a month at this point, only for rain to put a big wet stain on it. They figured they’d wait the rain out since the picnic was supposed to take place in the afternoon anyway, but the sky didn’t show any signs of giving up, literally pissing on their plans. With the time on her phone reading just shy of 6 PM, the tigress hovered her thumbs over her phone’s screen, turned to look out the window again to see that it was still raining, and then looked back at her phone with the most disappointed sigh. She started typing on her phone when she saw the three dots appear with both the mouse’s and red panda’s pictures next to them.

Charlie: This rain can suck my fat balls. 😡

Lauré: I do not want to have to say this, but raincheck?

Alex frowned when she read the texts from her friends, she had been looking forward to the picnic and even had a basket full of sandwiches, cheeses, and a very tasty homemade Caesar salad prepared. She’d have to either eat them all or keep them in the fridge until the rescheduled picnic date, but sandwiches never tasted as good after a day or so of refrigeration as they did when freshly made. On the bright side, though, at least the tigress had dinner sorted.

Alex spent about a minute pouting about the rain and looking out of the window some more, hoping for a last-minute miracle where the grey sky would suddenly clear. But after her hopes for a last-minute miracle went from 100 down to 0, the tigress typed up a response to the group chat.

Alex: Maybe we can try again tomorrow? 😔

The frown on the tiger’s face was so massive that she could feel the strain that it was having on her facial muscles. But she couldn’t force her lips into a smile no matter how hard she tried. With her phone still in her hand, she continued to stare at it as both Charlie’s and Lauré’s photos popped up with their respective three dots again.

Lauré: Yeah, we can try tomorrow! If it rains then, maybe we can do brunch at Alex’s?

Charlie: I thought lesbians didn’t do brunch…

Alex let out a snort when she read Charlie’s reply to the red panda and waited for the inevitable voice call that usually came after the mouse made any sort of snide remark toward her. But this time, there was nothing. The red panda’s three dots popped up on her screen for a few seconds before vanishing, it seemed like she needed a little more time to come up with a rebuttal. While Alex (and Charlie, too, probably) waited, she sent her response.

Alex: We can do that! Safe from any potential rain. ☺️

The tigress stared at the group text for a few more seconds to see if the red panda had come up with something to say back to Charlie yet, but when there wasn’t anything, she swiped away from the text chat and scrolled through the apps in her “Games” folder on her phone. She didn’t have very many games, since she was more of a console and PC gamer, but she did have a few classics; Hay Day, Jetpack Joyride, Fruit Ninja, and Doodle Jump, to name a few. But her favorite, although she was often ashamed to admit, was Candy Crush: Soda… She started playing it whenever she was bored on the job (model employee behavior) and she got hooked on the satisfying sounds and visuals that were meant to lure in dumb children, boomers, and some of Gen X; she could lose her millennial card for such a crime, and how would she get her avocado toast and inability to afford a house then?

When she scrolled to the page that had Candy Crush: Soda on it, Alex hovered her index finger over it for just a second before she tapped it, got up from her seat at the windowsill, and walked over to her bed to get a little comfier. The tiger let out a satisfied sigh as she sunk into her soft IKEA mattress and brought her phone so close to her face that her optometrist would shit himself. She watched as the game’s loading screen played out on her phone, and just as the intro played, she heard a loud electrical pop.

‘Fzzzzzzzzzzzpop!’

The ceiling light in her room went out and the room turned even gloomier than before. The tiger looked up from her phone at the ceiling titty to see if it would come back, but when it didn’t, she took in a deep breath, closed her eyes, and then opened them again.

“Fuck.” She grumbled.

As if her day wasn’t already going poorly, now she needed someone to help her change the ceiling light. With a sigh, Alex closed Candy Crush and reopened her text messaging app again.

Alex: Hey, do you know how to change a ceiling light?

---

One was often easily able to tell whenever it was a sad day for Alex; she’d mope around and do nothing all day, order junk food, and wear pants while she was doing said moping around her apartment. Alex currently checked two out of three of those boxes, but McDonald’s Spicy McNuggets were on her mind, so she was close to having the full trifecta. The tigress was on her bed again, with her phone up to her face, and the sounds of candies getting crushed echoing out of its speakers.

Just a few feet from the tigress’s bed was a step ladder with someone on it. With a cordless drill in hand, working away at the ceiling light that had just pooped out, the puma on top of the ladder let out the occasional grunt at the state of the electrical wiring of the particular ceiling tit that he was fixing. “Do you know when this was last changed?” he asked, the southern drawl in his voice made the tigress glance away from her sweets-smashing game and smile at him.

“Maaaaaaaaybe in the 90s? It was already here when I moved in…”

The handyman helping the tigress out was her neighbor, Ned. Ned was a puma, a Texan with a thick accent that Alex enjoyed hearing whenever she ran into him in the elevator or at their building’s pool. He lived in the apartment right across the hall from hers and from the conversations that they had; she knew he was handy. He often told her about how satisfying it was to fix things around his apartment rather than wait for the landlord to never send anyone over. When she texted him for help, she was a little bit worried that he might have been out of town, but when he replied with “Yes, I’ll be over in a minute,” and a smiley-faced emoji, she felt a little bit better about her no good very bad day.

“No wonder it’s busted. They only last for ten or so years these days, it’s a miracle this one has lasted that long.” The puma chuckled as he pulled out the old light fixture and put in one that he happened to have lying around in his apartment for some unknown reason. He made it look easy; with just one smooth move, he aligned the new ceiling light fixture with the drill holes from the previous one and used the cordless drill to secure it into place. The soft whirr from the drill was a little bit distracting and made the tigress’s ears flatten against her head a bit and it made her wonder how the puma wasn’t affected by it, not one bit. His ears stood the same whether the drill was on or off. Maybe he was, as they say, Texas Hardened. Watching him work his magic made Alex feel things, none of which were at all influenced by the fact that she was given a view of the man’s ass as he stood on the ladder. She was suddenly a little less bummed out about her soiled plans.

With his legs tensed up to keep himself steady, his ass was just that much more pronounced. Alex felt ashamed to stare, but she was in between levels on Candy Crush anyway, so just a smidge of disrespectful staring wouldn’t hurt. She bit her lip and almost whistled, but she was stopped by the sudden cease of operation of the cordless drill.

“Aaaaand all done,” Ned said with a smile as he pulled his cordless drill away from the freshly installed ceiling light and used a hand to check its adherence to the ceiling. After a few pulls and once he was sure it wouldn’t fall without significant force, he climbed down the ladder and started gathering his tools. Alex put her phone down, got up from the bed with a happy smile, and walked over to the light switch to test it out. Once she flicked the switch to the on position, the room lit up with a warm golden glow. The tigress let out a happy purr when her room lit up again and she even clapped her hands together to celebrate.

“Thank you so much. Are you sure there’s nothing I can repay you with? You can tell me how much the fixture was at least, and I can pay you back.”

Ned couldn’t help but smile when he saw the tigress cheer at such a simple thing. His ears flickered at her offer of compensation; he snickered, shook his head, and collected his drill and drill bits back into their box. Once his tools were all secured, he turned to look at the ladder. But before he could put that away, he felt a hand touch him on his shoulder. He looked at her hand on his shoulder before he turned around to look at her again.

“Or I could do you a favor sometime? Anything. I feel bad if this is pro bono.” Alex continued.

The tigress’s offer echoed through his head, and while he declined any form of cash payment at first, when he heard her offer again, he tilted his head to the side as he thought of a few “favors”.

“Well…”

---

“Soda Crush!” the suspiciously sexy voice on Alex’s game announced her mega combo out loud, making her realize that she still had the sound of the game on. She quickly held down the lower button on her phone’s volume rocker, but not before she let out a moan.

“Haaaaahhnnnhhh…”

The first lick after enduring half-a-dozen breaths blowing over your pussy was an incredible feeling, made even better by the slightly rough and unforgiving texture of a feline’s tongue. The way it combed over her mound and brushed against the grain of her fur had her struggling to keep her legs up for the puma claiming his compensation. Each lap of his tongue dragged from the very bottom of her pussy, almost at her taint, all the way up to the soft tuft of fur just above her clit. His tongue flicked once it reached the end of the line and splashed a mix of his saliva and Alex’s pussy juice onto her stomach.

Noticing the tiger’s legs shaking, Ned brought a hand to grab them and help hold them up for her. He was on his stomach while Alex was on her back, leaning comfortably against a fluffed-up pillow. She had her pants pulled down just the bare minimum for Ned to be able to access her pussy. Not that he minded, clothed sex was pretty hot, in his opinion. With the tiger’s legs steady, Ned took a moment to admire the pussy in front of him; with its pink lips, saliva and pussy juice sheen, and the cutest little button of a clit he had ever seen. Not to mention the scent. The smell of pussy was one of the world’s finer things; a bit musky, mixed in with sweat, a bit of pee, and a certain meaty sweetness that went together better than bacon and maple syrup. The puma’s large and pink nose wiggled and danced as he sniffed, and his breath blew over the tigress’s pussy again.

The taste of Alex’s pussy washed over Ned’s tongue with every lick he gave to it. A wave of flavor and scent pushed signals through his nervous system and activated all the right neurons. He felt his heart race as he dragged his tongue across the tigress’s pussy over and over again. Blood pumped to his dick and he got hard as a rock in just a few short seconds. His schlong pressed against his pants and tented them out. He shifted around a little and raised his hips so that he didn’t drill a hole in the tigress’s mattress with his dick. He tightened his grip around the tigress’s legs, pressed his muzzle in a little bit deeper into Alex’s crotch, slithered his tongue in between her pussy lips, and sunk it inside of her. He let out a purr as his nose bumped into her clit and momentarily looked up at the tigress before he closed his eyes and reeled his tongue back into his muzzle only to slide it out and penetrate her again. He slurped loudly as if he were downing the best ramen of his life, with Alex’s pussy juice flowing out of her and into his mouth and running down his cheek and chin.

‘Sluuuuuuuuuuuurrrp…’

Playing Candy Crush while getting eaten out provided an extra challenge; brainpower was very important in a match-three game, but when you had an eager man slurping on your junk like a Jell-O cup, it was hard to think about anything other than getting off. Eight different candy colors were hard to keep track of when you had a tongue buried deep inside of you. With the puma’s tongue wiggling inside her, Alex’s pussy clenched around it. She felt the fur on her legs stand up as a shiver of pleasure ran down her spine. Ned had a talented muscle that reached deep and brushed all over her inner walls. The underside of his tongue rubbed right over her g-spot, which made her toes curl.

Her pussy leaked juice like a faulty faucet fighting high water pressure. Her wetness spread from her pussy lips, through the fur on and around her crotch, and the bedding underneath her. A lot of it was caught by Ned, who sucked and suckled as her nectar flowed from her, onto his tongue, and into his mouth. His chin was so wet that it looked like was bad at bobbing for apples.

Ned’s rumbling purrs acted like a vibration motor that buzzed his tongue as it slithered in and out of Alex. He couldn’t get enough of her taste, her flavor, her SCENT. With his eyes still closed, he pulled his tongue back into his mouth and smacked his lips. There was nothing that tasted better than Alex Pussy™️.

---

“Ned?”

“Ned?”

Ned opened his eyes to see the tigress standing in front of him, which made him blink and tilt his head to the side, slightly confused. Just a moment ago he was face-first in Alex’s pussy and he could still taste her on his lips...

But the tigress was stood right in front of him, fully clothed, with her eyebrow raised and her hands on her hips.

“Huh?” Ned blinked and stopped smacking his lips. He shook his head to get himself back to reality and looked at the tigress.

“Let me repay you! It doesn’t have to be with money, how about I bake you some cookies?” the tigress repeated herself.

Ned smirked when he heard the tigress mention cookies. He nodded his head, turned around to fold his ladder, and put it under his arm. “Cookies sound lovely.” The puma smiled and smacked his lips again. The taste of pussy was still there. Odd, since it was only a daydream.

“Or….” Alex raised a brow at him and slipped her fingers underneath the waistband of her pants. She pulled them down and exposed her dripping wet pussy with a coy smile.

Ned glanced down at Alex’s pussy and found it hard to look back up. But when he eventually did, he nodded and put his tools down so carelessly that the drill and bits scattered everywhere.

“Even better.” He purred.

---

Art by Marjani 

Ned by ContriteCougar