リスクが高いです (Pixiv Fanbox)

Maxi side story desu.[can skip]

actually New years

I do not celebrate desu.

every year I have to hide in a safe place and pray for the night to end desu.

please do not feel sorry for me ne

because this is how I have been live and how I fight until now desu.

I always soaking with blood since I was a little desu.

every day always ends up with the injuries desu.

I going to talk about my [bad luck] desu.

I have to be caution every single step I take in life.

while walking the same road with everyone, but no one knows what it takes for me to be able to walk along with them desu.

my lazy brother once said

[you just fail to notice your good luck that why you feel unlucky ]

but after we spent a lot of time together

[did you do something bad to the God]

when I put my life in someone hand they all end up in failure desu.

when I pray for my own success they never once come true.[never desu.]

when a teacher in the room tries to pick someone

and that someone is always me desu.

one day I feel like all I have to do is be ready for everything desu.

[you can not wait for help] that what I keep telling myself at that time desu.

I also a soccer player once desu. when I was a kid I dream to die on the field desu.

but sadly my part got taken away one by one before my dream comes true desu.

first, my right knee is broken then I train my left knee

then both of my knees is broken

then I give up on the speed, give up on become the forward.

I no longer hit the ball hard

I no longer run at my top speed

I no longer be able to make an impact with the other players .

and now the doctor said something about my heart

[you got some rare malfunction on the left downside of your heart,

so you no longer play football desu.]

that means

stay on the field only risk to give me more injuries and die for real desu.

one day I give up desu because I do not want to end my story so soon desu.

and that day, I realize that God must really hate me desu.

all my entire life is lost desu. and lose and lose again after and after desu.

I still not sure how Fanbox is working just fine for many years now desu.

to me

Fanbox and Hentai life is my first win desu.

that why this 2021

If I can not pray for my own success then I will pray for more challenge desu.

and instead of praying, I hope your guys happy

and do your best to fight with the incoming challenge desu.

P.S.

every new year, people always shoot the bullet into the sky desu.

that why I need to stay inside the ground desu.

I do not blame them desu. shoot as much as you want you will not hit me!